If we can save our lives
by ariaswan
Summary: Set 4 years post-Meteor. Elena left Edge of her own accord, but she always thought her fellow turks would contact her again. After two years, she has given up hope of that happening- til one night Reno appears at her door... renoXelena. m for adult themes
1. Now

Chapter One

Now

Elena was getting ready for bed when the knock at her door came. It was only nine o'clock, but she'd been up late the previous night, and anyway, she hadn't slept much recently. For once she was tired, and she wanted to take full advantage of that.

She was tempted to ignore whoever it was, to just head upstairs, pretend there was no-one there. But politeness, as much as curiosity, made her walk through the kitchen, aware that she was dressed just in a thin nightshirt and robe, to see who it was. She couldn't think of anyone she knew here in Junon that would come to her door, unannounced. There were a number of men that she had been seeing casually, but none of them knew where she lived. Her relationships were anonymous, played out in sleazy bars and quickly booked hotel rooms. There was no-one personal in her life, no-one that would seek her out. She was a bit nervous as she unlocked the door.

She was unprepared for who was actually there. She swallowed hard, taking a step back involuntarily from the tall red haired man who stood before her, hands shoved into the pockets of his expensive black suit, not the same one as he'd worn back then, but equally messy. Shirttails untucked, buttons undone. Despite the fact the clothing was designer, and had obviously cost a lot of money, it still didn't fit him right, hanging from him awkwardly. He'd always looked strange in a suit. Uncomfortable, and slightly exposed. Though he was smiling, she got the impression that he felt that way, still.

'Reno,' she said, softly. 'What are you doing here?'

'Hello to you too,' he said, rolling his eyes, still smiling.

She frowned. 'How did you find me?'

'You think Shinra doesn't keep tabs on its former employees?' he said, grinning.

'Why have you come now?'

He bit his lip, nervously. 'I would've come before, but... I didn't think you'd want to see me.'

'I wanted to see you,' she said pointedly. 'It's been two years though.'

He couldn't meet her eyes. 'I'm sorry.'

They stood in silence, Reno staring at the ground, Elena staring right at Reno. Eventually, he spoke.

'Can I come in?'

'I don't think so,' she said.

He sighed. 'Elena, please. I want to talk to you.'

'You've had two years to come here!' she snapped, incredulously.

He looked away. 'I know. You know, Elena, you knew where I was, too.'

She shook her head. 'I never want to step foot in Edge again. I thought you'd have realised that.'

He shrugged, helplessly. 'Elena, _please_.'

Something in his tone got to her. A sort of desperation. The memories that had been in the forefront of her mind every moment for the last two years flooded back to her. Reno, the man who had made her into a Turk, with his gentle teasing and boundless patience. The man she'd both admired and pitied, so cool and professional one moment, and then childish and needy the next. He'd craved friendship, and she'd given him that. He'd never known, she guessed, that she was completely in love with him. But then, she'd never known that he was in love with her. When she left Edge, she'd waited for the calls, the visits, the contact that had never come. Her heart had broken a bit more each day that she hadn't heard from him. Today, her heart was dead.

'I'm sorry, Reno,' she said, closing the door in his face.

xoxoxox

The following morning she got out of bed at five am, having not slept, once again. Apprehensively, she approached the door. When she'd looked out her window, several times, during the night, he'd been there, sitting on the door step, his head against the wall, not sleeping, just staring miserably at the ground. When she opened the door, she was unsurprised to find him still there, long legs drawn to his chest, face resting on his knees. She crouched beside him, gently shaking his arm.

'Reno,' she said softly. As she waited for him to stir, she saw that his hair was shorter, the long ponytail he'd always had gone. She wondered why he'd decided to cut it. It did look kind of nice now though.

He looked a bit confused as he woke, then he saw her. 'Hey,' he mumbled.

'Come in,' she said.

He sat on her sofa as she made them coffee, then she came and sat beside him. For a moment they sat in silence.

'I'm sorry,' he said, quietly.

She shrugged, awkwardly. 'I just... I thought you'd understand about Edge.'

'I thought I did,' he said, rubbing his neck nervously. Elena fought the urge to smile. She'd always found that little tic of his very endearing. Then she thought of the last time she'd seen him, and the urge faded. She felt herself growing cold again.

'How are the others?' she asked, tonelessly.

'Rude is fine. Tseng too.' He smiled slightly. 'Reeve's wife had a baby.'

Elena arched an eyebrow. 'Reeve got married?'

He nodded. 'To his secretary, of all the clichés. Hina. She's nice. Their kid is sweet. A little girl.'

'Does Rude see Tifa much?'

Reno shrugged. 'Here and there. Cloud's around a lot now, and she's pretty busy, with the kids and the bar...' He looked at her. 'What do you do these days?'

'You mean the Shinra haven't found that out?' she asked, mockingly.

Reno flinched at her tone, and she felt guilty for a moment. It wasn't Reno's fault, everything that had happened...

'I work at the hospital. Nursing.'

He looked surprised. 'You're a nurse?'

She nodded, smiling faintly. 'I took a medical course as a subsidiary in my Turks training, and they're so short staffed they accepted that. I'm doing formal training as well, on the side.'

'Do you enjoy it?' he asked.

She thought about it for a moment. 'I guess I do. It's weird hours, and stressful, but... I like that I'm saving people, rather than killing them.'

An awkward silence settled over them once more, as they both remembered their past as Turks. Reno, in particular, held the scars. After all, he had been the one to activate the bomb that had dropped the Plate onto Sector 7, killing god knows how many people. She sometimes wondered how he had lived with himself after that.

'That must be nice,' he said, finally.

She nodded. 'Yeah. It is.' She thought of something. 'How's Rufus?'

Reno smiled. 'As weird as ever. He and Reeve are in constant conflict, but...' he trailed off. 'It's not so bad being around him anymore.'

'Does he suffer any after effects of the accident?' In spite of herself, Elena was interested about her old friends and colleagues. She had thought about them a lot over the last two years.

'None,' said Reno, shaking his head. 'Rufus is young. He recovered easily.'

Elena thought about this. 'We're all young,' she observed softly. 'I don't feel it though. I feel sixty five, rather than twenty five.'

Reno didn't know what to say to this. He felt the same, pretty much- stunned that so much could happen in a lifetime that had thus far only lasted twenty six years. Rude was only thirty one, and Tseng only thirty six, and yet the four of them...

'It's pretty strange,' he conceded, uselessly.

She nodded, and then she couldn't think of anything to say. Hard to believe that four years ago, she never _stopped _speaking.

Reno was still rubbing his neck, anxiously. She began to wonder why he was here, and asked him this, quite bluntly.

He looked away. 'I miss you,' he said softly. 'We were always such good friends, weren't we Lena?'

She nodded. 'Yeah. We were.'

'I knew you wouldn't wanna see me, but Tseng told me I had to try, that I was being weak not finding you.' He smiled slightly. 'I seem to have quite a reputation for being weak. Sector 7, the Purges...'

'Reno. Don't.'

'Sorry,' he said quietly. He wracked at his brain, for some kind of topic. 'So,' he said, trying to sound cheerful. 'Are you seeing anyone?'

She shrugged. 'A couple of people. Not seriously.' She paused. 'You?' She was trying to sound casual, but all the feelings she'd once had for him were eating at her. As much as she now resented him, she knew that if he said he was with someone, she would be upset.

'Too busy. We work every day practically.'

'You got given time off to come down here?'

'Heh. Kinda. Reeve didn't strictly grant it, but Tseng is covering for me.'

She smiled. 'You never followed the rules when we were Turks, either.'

'We're still Turks, Lena,' he said stubbornly.

She arched an eyebrow. 'Really?'

He nodded. 'Of course we are. We always will be.'

Elena shrugged. 'Maybe.'

The peculiar silence came over them again. Elena watched Reno out of the corner of her eye, as he stared at the ground.

'Why did you really come?' she asked him.

He didn't answer immediately. After a long time, he said 'Did you know Reeve wanted to put you on trial, after you left?'

Elena looked up, startled. 'He did? For what?'

'He said he could prove that you were selling Shinra secrets. Tseng told him we'd all quit if he did, though.'

Elena smiled slightly. 'Turk loyalty,' she said, softly. 'Cute.'

Reno rubbed the back of his wrist anxiously. 'Y,yeah. We'd never sell you out, Lena.'

Elena felt a familiar gnawing in her stomach at the sincerity of his words. Reno was as transparent as glass- everything he felt was etched onto his face, most of the time, anyway. Somehow, he managed to hide his feelings during missions, to go about them as though he had no cares whatsoever. But the second the mission finished, his cool blankness would slip, and those close to him could see instantly how he felt. Usually tired and unhappy.

'So Reeve was really gonna do that?' Elena sighed. 'I don't know why I'm so surprised. I always knew power would change him.'

Reno fidgeted awkwardly. 'He's not so bad,' he said loyally. God. Elena felt sick. She'd forgotten how desperate he always was to follow and protect those of a higher standing than him. It had used to break her heart and annoy her in equal measures. She just shrugged.

'I have to go to work,' she told him.

He nodded. 'Okay. Can I meet you tonight?'

She nearly said no, but something stopped her. Was she crazy? This was _Reno_, her friend. The person she'd missed most of all from her old life. As much as she wanted to be strong and turn him away, she knew that she couldn't.

'I'll be home at about three,' she said. 'There's probably beer in the fridge. The TV is there. There's a bathroom through that corridor.'

Reno gave her a little smile, understanding. 'Thank you, Elena.'

She shook her head. 'I'll be back at three,' she said again. She left before either of them had the chance to say anymore.

A/N- This fic was spawned by the bit at the end of disc two where you meet the Turks in the tunnel at Midgar, and get the choice of whether to fight them or not. I was playing the other day, and chose not to fight, and saw that Reno says something that –to my crazy relena obsessed mind lol- could be an indication of a future relationship for them. and so i started to write this, which follows game canon, but ignores Advent Children and probably Before Crisis too. Please review! xD


	2. Then

Chapter Two

Then

Elena knew the only reason _she_ was being fast tracked, and not one of the other cadets, was because Rosalind was her sister, and not because she was actually _better _than the others. But as far as she was concerned, it was the first time that her glacial, do-gooder of a sister had actually done anything helpful for her, and she sure as hell wasn't going to argue with it.

Tseng had come to see her, and explained the situation. AVALANCHE was becoming a force to be reckoned with once again, and the three Turks that had been unscathed in the fight against Zirconiade were not enough. Added to that was the problem of Sephiroth and the Ancient, and the Turks were in desperate need of help.

'It's unusual for a cadet to be moved through before graduation,' Tseng told her. 'A lot of expectations will be placed upon you, do you understand that?'

She nodded, trying to appear far more confident than she felt. 'Of course, sir.'

He nodded, regarding her a little warily. 'Have you met Reno and Rude?'

'Very briefly,' she said.

Tseng bit his lip, nodding slightly. 'You'll meet Rude later today. I imagine you'll work with him for the time being.'

Elena frowned. 'I thought they were partners?'

The Turk commander seemed troubled. 'They are,' he said, finally. 'Reno has other orders for the time being.'

_'You're too late. Once I push this button...'_

Elena nodded, accepting this. She had no reason not to, after all. 'Of course, sir.' She licked her lips nervously. 'I start now?'

'Yes. You'll come with me now to HQ. The Turks are mainly based on the 59th floor of the building, though we also have dealings on the 66th and 69th floors. You will receive key cards to all the appropriate locations.'

She nodded. 'Okay.'

'I need to be somewhere later today, so Rude will be in charge of you until I return. Don't be put off by his... appearances. He's a very easy person.'

'Of course. You have a mission, sir?'

_'Our orders were to find and capture the last remaining Ancient.'_

He nodded briskly. 'Yes. Elena... Today is a very... busy day. You will not find it easy, but I hope it doesn't affect your performance...'

She got it. This was a test for her, seeing if she could remain level headed under even the most difficult circumstances. It was not a test she intended on failing.

'You can count on me,' she told him.

He smiled slightly. 'I hope so.'

They were both silent in the car on the way to HQ. Elena had never been in an armoured Shinra vehicle before, or at least, she didn't remember if she had. There were pictures of her as a child seated in the lap of her father, a former Shinran official, in a car similar to this. She had almost no memory of those days, before the war against Wutai and her father's death. She often wondered what her mother really thought about both her daughters going into Shinra, the company that had killed her husband...

She was forced out of the reverie when she saw that Tseng was trying to talk to her.

'Sorry, sir,' she mumbled.

He waved it off. 'Just don't lose concentration in the field,' he warned her. 'Anyway, I was just saying, you'll have to have some kind of face to face meeting with President Shinra sometime in the near future, as all new Turks do. Has Rosalind told you much about him?'

Elena swallowed. Her sister had told her that the President was a rude, sexist old fuck, but she doubted that was what Tseng wanted to hear, so she just mumbled something unintelligible.

Tseng smiled. 'He's a rude, sexist old fuck,' he told her, smile widening when he saw the recognition on her face. 'It's an opinion shared by all the Turks, both active and inactive, and I'm sure you'll agree when you meet him. In fact, if you don't agree, we may have to rethink your contract.'

Elena grinned. She was very relieved that Tseng was such an easy person to be near, as he was the first Turk she was having any kind of official dealings with, Rosalind excepted. She'd heard from some of the other cadets that he could be rather quick to lose his temper, but so far he seemed very calm, almost mellow.

As they made their way up in the elevator, having gotten through the security barrier with just a nod from Tseng, Elena began to panic about meeting those that she would be working in such close contact with. Who was it she would be meeting now... Rude? The tall, silent man, never without his sunglasses. All she remembered about him was thinking that he either had a very dry sense of humour, or none at all. He was always spoken of as a pair at the academy, when the cadets talked eagerly about the future colleagues they wanted to have. RenoandRude, RudeandReno. Reno's reputation at the academy was vast, though most of the cadets had never even seen the man, let alone met him. Reno was the fun one, the crazy one, the one the guys wanted to be and the girls wanted to fuck. He was highly regarded by all due to his absolute dedication to the job, and his absolute dedication to the fun stuff that came _after _the job. Rosalind was fond of him, and of Rude also, but Elena was rather scared of meeting them. What if they didn't like _her, _let alone her liking them?

They stepped out of the elevator onto the 59th floor, where the Turks were based, stopping in front of a door which had Reno's and Rude's names carved onto it.

'This is the office you'll share with them,' Tseng told her. He checked his watch and grimaced. 'I have to go,' he said. 'Rude should be inside, he knows you're coming. Reno and I will be here this evening at some point... I'd advise you stay in the housing we can provide you here within the building for the next couple of nights.'

_'Think you can escape in time?'_

Elena nodded. 'Of course sir.'

Tseng seemed as though he was going to say something else, but he stopped, and just watched Elena for a moment. She felt herself blushing under his scrutiny. Finally, he said 'Good luck, Elena,' before turning and heading back towards the elevator, without another glance at her. She watched him go, mouth dry, stomach churning. She lifted her hand to rap gently on the door. When it opened, her career as a Turk would officially begin.

A/N- The bits in italics are quotes from the game, mostly from the bit on the Sector 7 Plate. I used the name Rosalind because that seems to be the accepted name for Gun (female), a BC Turk and Elena's sister (and also cause my sister's name is Roslynd :-p). I'm _trying _to make it as canon as poss, but forgive me if some details don't ring true. Review puhleeaase XD


	3. Remember

Chapter Three

Now

Elena was distracted and nervous all day at work, making stupid mistakes where normally she was flawless. She was terrified of going back to her house, where Reno was, knowing the inevitable questions and accusations that would fly. They would have to talk about everything that had happened, all the little details that Elena had tried her hardest to forget. The screams of pain, the begging faces... and at the centre of it, herself and Reno, turning away, pretending it wasn't happening...

'No!' she snapped at herself, digging her nails into her skin. She may not be able to go back and change what had happened, but she could stop others from being sick, from being in pain. That was why she was working here, wasn't it?

One of her colleagues, a sad looking older woman named Ina, came and sat beside her as she took a break in the staff room.

'Is everything okay, dear?' she asked, concern showing on her face.

Elena nodded, biting her lip. 'Yeah... I... I have an old friend visiting,' she explained, sighing.

Ina examined her face. 'Not someone you wanted to see again?'

Elena laughed humorlessly. 'No, someone I've been wanting to see for years. But... He's making me remember,' she said, almost to herself. She sighed. 'Oh, I don't know. I don't know what to do.'

The older woman shrugged. 'You can't avoid the past, Elena.'

She felt like screaming at the old bitch for that. _Do you have any idea what I have _done_? The atrocities I have committed? The lives I have taken? _Instead, she just nodded. 'Yeah... I guess you're right.'

That afternoon, when she finished her shift, she sat in the car for a long time, staring at the steering wheel, but not really seeing anything. How long did she sit there, just gazing? When she shook her head and tried to focus, she saw that the sun was on its way down, dusk settling over the town. A glance at the clock showed that she had been staring sightlessly for nearly two hours. _God... _she laughed at herself. The little rookie, who had used to babble incessantly, had just sat there, doing nothing, saying nothing, barely even aware of where she was. _I've changed..._

When she opened the door, she saw that Reno was sitting on the couch, stiff backed.

'Hi,' she called out, softly.

He jumped, nervously. 'Lena, god...' He frowned, looking at the clock. 'I was worried. You said you be back at three...'

She shrugged. 'I can look after myself. I've been doing it for all this time.' She went into the kitchen, poured a glass of wine, drank it almost in one gulp. She saw Reno raise an eyebrow, and rolled her eyes. God, like he'd never had a drink after work.

'Reeve called me,' Reno told her. 'I've been suspended for a week, for skipping out of Edge.'

Elena smiled, faintly. 'Great punishment. That's like a vacation.'

He grinned. 'I know. Reeve doesn't quite have the hang of the whole 'leadership' thing yet. At Shinra, I'd have got a month of desk duty, or working with Heidegger or something.'

Elena hesitated. As much as she hated to admit it, her curiosity about the lives of those she'd left behind was growing. She had a feeling Reno could see this, because he said 'Heidegger, Scarlett and Palmer all got jobs at Neo-Shinra.'

Elena raised an eyebrow. 'Really? I woulda thought Reeve would have wanted to keep them as far away as is humanly possible.'

Reno shrugged. 'He felt bad for them, I think.'

Elena came and sat on the sofa, leaving a space between herself and Reno. They sat in awkward silence for a moment, the only noise being Reno nervously scratching his neck. Finally, Elena spoke.

'I can't forgive you, Reno, if that's what you've come here for...'

He laughed, softly. 'Heh. Yeah, I kinda figured. I wouldn't ask it of you, though.'

Elena looked away. 'Reno, please... why are you here?' She stared at him, the pain evident in her eyes.

He flinched, looking away from her. 'You really don't wanna see me, huh.'

She shook her head. 'That's not it. I've missed you so much, Reno.'

He smiled, a genuine, sad smile. 'I've missed you, Lena.'

She bit her lip, so hard it drew blood. 'When I see you, I see-'

He cut her off. 'The Purges?' He swallowed hard. 'Yeah, I know.' He frowned, reaching out and touching her lip, gently pressing his fingertip to the drop of blood. Elena's eyes drifted shut. _Your touch... God... _With difficulty, she opened her eyes, and jerked her head back, out of his reach. His hand hovered for a moment, then he clumsily withdrew it. Elena forced herself to harden her heart.

'You seem to like having blood on your hands,' she remarked curtly, barely glancing at his long slim fingers. She left the room, without another word.

xoxoxoxo

When she returned to the sitting room, sometime later, Reno was gone. There wasn't even a trace of him left. _Do I like it better like this? _she wondered bitterly. _When I can pretend he never existed?_

She figured she should cook something, but she couldn't summon the energy. She tried to remember the last time she'd had a full meal, the last time she'd actually been hungry. Vaguely, she told herself that she needed to eat, that she was going to get ill if she didn't, but she just couldn't be bothered. She grabbed her purse, and headed to the nearest bar.

She wasn't surprised at all to find Reno inside, head in his hands, surrounded by empty glasses. Wordlessly, she sat down beside him. She thought of the last time they'd been in a bar together...

xoxoxox

_'Are you okay?' _

_'Stupid question.'_

_'... Sorry.'_

_'Why are you here, Lena?'_

_'I just... wanted to make sure you don't do anything stupid.'_

_'I'm not you, Elena.'_

_'You know what? Fuck you, Reno. I came here to be nice. You think I like sitting in some stinking bar, watching you get hammered?'_

_'...Thank you, Elena.'_

_Blink. 'Reno?'_

_His lips were warm, and softer than she'd though they would be._

_'Oh, god... Reno... Oh, _god_...'_

_'Lena,' breath. 'Lena, I... god, _Lena_... god...'_

_The sun was coming up, and she was smoking a cigarette._

_'That's a dirty habit.'_

_She shrugged._

_'Not talking to me, huh? Fine. Be like that. I'm going to work. There's coffee and stuff, if you want it, and you can take a shower if you want. And I love you.'_

_Then he was gone._

_Blink._

_Did he say...? Elena shook her head, trying to clear it. When she went to the kitchen, she found he had no coffee. Had he lied to her twice? Had he even spoken at all? Exhausted, and over emotional, Elena sat on his couch and wept._

xoxoxox

She ordered a drink. Wutain Sake. Reno snorted. 'Onto the hard shit, huh Lena?'

She rolled her eyes. 'You know what that's like, I guess.'

He shrugged. 'We all do, right?'

Elena didn't reply, finishing her drink quickly. It mixed unpleasantly with the wine she'd already drunk, making her feel tipsy already. 'What are your plans then, Reno, for your week of freedom? Before you go right back to sticking your head up the ass of every Shinra exec. that's available, that is.'

'Fuck yourself, Elena,' he said, shortly.

She winced at the anger and hurt in his tone. _How cold must I be if I can get that voice out of Reno? _she wondered. 'I'm sorry,' she said, quietly.

'It's okay,' he said, a little more amiably. They sat in silence for a moment.

'I... you know that I don't...' she trailed off, uselessly. 'What I'm trying to say is... Sector 7, I don't... I don't blame you for that. I shouldn't have said-'

He cut her off. 'I know. It's okay. I'm weak, Lena. I know that. You think I haven't tried to change?'

It was a genuine question. She shrugged, uncomfortably. 'I don't know.'

'Well I have. Not very successfully, clearly. I still...' he swallowed hard. 'I still helped out in the Purges.'

Silence fell again. Elena ordered them both another drink. She felt her gag reflexes working as she swallowed the sour liquid. Reno's face was similarly contorted.

'Man, how can Tseng drink this crap like it's water?' he remarked, coughing a bit.

Elena almost smiled. 'Remember in Wutai, when Rude had nearly a bottle full, and passed out outside that ninja's house?'

Reno grinned. 'When he woke up all those cats were asleep on him,' he recalled, laughing.

The blonde ex-Turk smiled, gazing at her friend. 'Reno,' she said, a sudden surge of emotion in her voice. For a moment, she was able to block out all the bad memories, and just remember the good ones. Maybe it was the drink. _Probably_ it was just the drink. _But you do miss him_, she reminded herself. 'Where are you staying tonight?' she asked him, in a soft voice.

A/N- the next chapter should be up in the next couple of days, in which our heroine meets her colleagues for the first time... _PLEASE_ review makes little begging face XD


	4. Fire

Chapter Four

Then

Elena twisted the handle and entered the room. Three desks were set in a sort of semi-circle, all complete with computers and sheathes of paper. At the one to the left, a tall, incredibly well muscled man was sat, a non-plussed expression visible beneath expensive sunglasses.

'H,hi,' she stammered, trying to smile. 'I'm Elena? Rosalind's sister? I, uh, I'll be your new colleague?' Inwardly, she kicked herself. _God, Elena. Get a hold of yourself. You're a Turk now!_

The man grunted. 'Rude,' he said, in a surprisingly soft voice. He indicated the most central desk. 'That's Reno's. You'll take the other.'

She nodded, moving nervously towards it. As she sat down, Rude said 'Are you aware of what's happening today?'

Elena shook her head. 'N,no. Tseng said he and Reno would be back later...?'

'...' Rude sighed. 'Just remember what you are now, okay?'

Elena wondered what he meant by that. 'Of course, sir.'

'Don't call me sir. And what_ever _you do, don't call Reno it.'

Chastised, Elena mumbled 'Of course.'

There was a moment of silence. 'You know the building?' asked Rude, not sounding too interested.

'We were made to memorise it's blueprints at the academy.'

An almost smile passed over his face. 'Good. You have any questions?'

She squirmed slightly, uncertain as to what she should say. Should she appear curious, or should she make herself seem as though she knew everything already?

'Erm, no...?'

Rude sighed. 'Elena.' He sounded strange, saying her name. She frowned, uncomfortably. 'It's okay,' he said, unexpectedly. 'You're being thrown in at a rough time. You'll pick everything up.'

She smiled. 'Thank you, si- I mean, Rude.'

He shrugged. 'Don't thank me. Just don't fuck up.'

For the next few hours, he showed her the administrative side of things- how to write up mission reports and such like. Then he checked her knowledge of Shinra rules and protocol 'Most of which you'll break anyway,' as he informed her.

'Mostly rookies start at Sector Eight,' he told her, in that soft voice. 'But...' he trailed off, then shrugged. 'Tseng can explain,' he said.

She was about to say something more when the door opened, and a tall, lanky red headed figure came in, swearing and muttering under his breath. He stopped abruptly when he saw Elena, turning instantly to Rude for an explanation.

'This is Elena. If you ever attended meetings, you'd know she was the new Turk,' Rude said, tiredly. He turned to Elena. 'This is Reno.'

The pair stared at each other for a moment. A flash of recognition passed over Reno's face.

'Yeah, I met you, didn't I?'

Elena nodded. 'Rosalind's my sister,' she said in a small voice.

Reno arched an eyebrow. 'I see,' he mused. He shrugged. 'Okay. Fine.' He sighed. 'Missed the fucking Ancient again,' he told Rude.

Rude's expression was unreadable. 'She's pretty tough.'

'She had some guy with her...'

_'They were... Mako eyes.'_

'Bodyguard? Boyfriend?'

'He looked like a Soldier.'

Elena listened to the conversation feeling awkward, wondering what was happening. Rude seemed to realise she was confused, because he said 'There's this girl, an Ancient, we've been seeking her for a long time.'

Reno cut him off. 'The little bitch keeps getting away, but one of these days,' he shook his head, eyes burning. Then he frowned. 'Where's Tseng? I'da thought he'd have stayed around if there's a rookie.'

'He's with Reeve and the mayor,' said Rude.

An odd expression flashed over Reno's face. 'Heidegger around?' he asked, casually.

'I think he's there too.'

'The President?'

'... Yeah.'

Reno sighed. 'Okay,' he said, sounding defeated. 'I... should go,' he said, not sounding as if he was talking to his colleagues anymore. He looked at Elena suddenly. 'Nice to meet you, rookie,' he said, his voice a weird mix of sincere and emotionless.

Elena nodded, confused. 'Ah, you to, sir, I mean, Reno.'

He smiled, almost sadly. 'See you later, folks,' he said, as he left. Rude didn't reply, just stared after him.

Elena waited a moment, then said 'Is something...?'

Rude cut her off. 'It's okay,' he said. 'You'll be briefed.'

xoxoxoxo

At around eleven that night, Elena was sitting at her desk, practising writing reports. Earlier, she'd spent an hour in the shooting range, then she'd been shown around the building by one of the mayor's lackeys, then she and Rude had played cards for a while.

'Standard Turk practise,' he told her. 'We wait around a lot. You gotta know how to play.'

So they'd played poker til around half ten, then Rude had sighed and reluctantly gone back to his computer, telling Elena to just hang around for a bit. Looking at the clock, he said 'Tseng and Reno won't be long.'

And so at eleven, she was just sitting at her desk, pretty much minding her own business. The window was slightly open, the warm, muggy Midgar air filtering in. It was nearly quiet outside, save for the usual distant traffic sounds.

_'It's time.'_

A sudden, sharp explosion snapped her from her thoughts. Alarmed, she turned to Rude. 'Wha...' she trailed off, seeing outside the window. Smoke, rising...

_'Mission accomplished.'_

Sighing, Rude repeated his words of earlier. 'Tseng and Reno won't be long,' and Elena understood.

She forced back a wave of nausea, as the sound of screams reached the Upper Plate, even from the bowels of the slums. This was a test, it was all a test, just a test... 'Of course,' she said, with a little smile. Rude nodded at her.

True to his word, Tseng and Reno were back within forty minutes. Reno went straight to the infirmary, with a suspected broken arm and a number of cuts and bruises. Tseng took the elusive Ancient to a prison cell, then went to tell the President she was finally caught. When he was done with their superior, Tseng came to Reno and Rude, and now Elena's, office. He looked tired, but there was a contentment to him that surprised Elena.

'It's done,' he told Rude.

The large man grunted. 'You don't say.'

'Elena.' The Wutain man turned to her. 'Can you go and sit with Reno in the infirmary? He's a pain when he's injured, but he might be easier for the medical staff to handle if he's got someone to distract him.'

_Meaning_thought Elena, _someone to aggravate. _But she smiled. 'Of course.' She tried not to let how shell-shocked she was show, but Tseng seemed to notice.

'Elena,' he watched her, biting his lip. 'You understand, don't you? You heard about the reactors destroyed by AVALANCHE?' She nodded. 'We needed to show them that they can't expect to get away with it. They're terrorists. It's extreme, but, by destroying Sector Seven, we've probably stopped them from killing thousands more.'

It was a funny logic, mused Elena, when you considered how many would have been in Sector Seven when it was destroyed. But Tseng seemed one hundred percent sincere, and she found herself nodding, somehow believing it herself. 'Of course. AVALANCHE need to know that Shinra will not accept their petty terrorism.'

Tseng smiled, a genuine, teeth showing smile, an occurrence that she would soon learn was incredibly rare. 'That's exactly right,' he said, sounding pleased. He nodded once. 'You're going to be a good Turk, Elena. Rosalind and your family will have much to be proud of, I'm sure.'

Elena allowed herself a smile, though she didn't really care what her sister thought. She cared what Tseng thought though. There was so much to admire in him... For the second time that day, she realized he was speaking, and she was paying absolutely no attention.

'... on the sixty eight floor,' he was saying, handing her a keycard

_Sixty eighth... _Of course. The infirmary. 'I'll get there right away,' she said, saluting him quickly.

He nodded. 'Thank you.'

He turned to Rude, and Elena realised she was dismissed. She went quickly to the elevator, swiping her card. She watched the skyline, lacking somewhat now. There were smoking embers visible, though happily she could no longer hear the screams.

The nurses directed her straight to Reno's room, and she found the redheaded man yelling at a doctor for trying to pop his arm back into place. When she entered, both men looked up at her. Reno smiled in recognition.

'Hey there rookie. This jackass here thinks he's going to reset my arm. Tell him to fuck off, wouldja?'

The doctor glared at her. 'Tell him I'll be seeing him for a limb amputation if he doesn't get it reset now.'

Cautiously, she said 'Reno, maybe you should just get it done...?'

He watched her for a moment, then sighed. 'Fine. Whatever. Just make it quick okay?'

It was over in a matter of seconds, with a sickening pop and a sharp breath, and then the doctor was gone, telling Reno to get some rest. The second it was just them in the room, Reno got up, going to look out the window. He didn't speak for a moment, then he turned to Elena.

'I'll probably get a couple weeks vacation,' he said, almost cheerfully, though his eyes were sad. 'Not that there's anywhere to go on this shithole planet. But I can rest up, you know?'

Elena nodded. 'Rest is good,' she said softly, uselessly.

Reno nodded at her, a kind of gratefulness in his eyes that Elena hadn't mentioned the obvious. She smiled at him, trying to convey her understanding, though truthfully she felt sick. She could smell the slums on Reno's blazer, discarded on the chair, and for a moment, when she looked at him, she would have sworn she saw flames dancing on his head, licking at his face.

A/N- a pretty long chapter, and not one I'm too happy with. I've tried to get across how the Plate being dropped was something the Turks _had _to accept _or else_, but I'm not sure I managed it. It might be edited at a later date, if I can think how to improve it. Anyway, I'd appreciate feedback on this chapter, so y'll know what that means. Review! Please? The next chapter's ready, and if you review, I'll put it up quicker XD


	5. Care

Chapter Five

Now

Within the door of Elena's house they kissed, but it felt awkward. They were being tentative, as though they'd never kissed before, as though they were strangers to one another's bodies. It frustrated Elena. She _wanted _Reno, there was no delicate way to put it. She pulled him closer, kissing him with renewed passion. For a moment he responded, and Elena gave a little moan. Reno pulled back. She looked at him, her face flushed.

'What's wrong?' she asked, but then she pulled him closer, kissing him again, fingers winding through his red hair.

He sighed, moving further from her. 'I'm not your fucking toy, Elena.'

Elena's eyes widened, surprised by the venom in his voice. 'I don't... I'm not...'

He cut her off. 'You're bitter and lonely, I get it.'

She opened her mouth to speak, stunned, but he wouldn't let her.

'So, tonight we have sex, then tomorrow... you never talk to me again? Forget the fact we were Turks, the fact we were _friends_?'

Elena struggled to stay calm. 'Yeah, sure we were friends. But that was a long time ago, Reno.'

He blinked. 'So... you really were just gonna fuck me, then never talk to me again?'

She didn't answer immediately. Was that what it was? Was this her kiss off to him? She swallowed. 'I don't know, Reno.'

They stood in silence for a minute, not looking at each other. Reno sighed. 'I guess this is it, then.'

Elena grew angry suddenly. 'You had two years to find me, you know! We might have had a chance if you'd just-'

He cut her off again. 'I know.'

She shivered at the emotion in his voice. It reminded her of something...

'Reno, once you said something to me... when we were in the tunnels underneath Midgar...'

He looked at her in surprise. 'You remember that?'

She nodded. 'You never told me what you meant,' she said, softly.

Reno didn't speak, he just grabbed her and kissed her. She wrapped her arms round his neck, pulling him closer, hooking one of her legs round him. As they pulled at one another's clothes, she wondered if it was worth it even trying to make it to the bedroom. She kicked off her shoes, frantically unbuttoning Reno's shirt, even as he unhooked her bra. It felt weird and familiar at the same time. His touch found her and she cried out, halfway between pleasure and pain.

xoxoxoxo

She woke early the following morning, and was surprised to see that Reno was no longer in the bed. His clothes were gone from the floor; all that remained of him was the hint of his scent- soap and warmth and spice. Elena frowned sleepily, pulling a thin robe on to cover her nudity.

Reno was in the sitting room, on the couch. He didn't smile at her when she entered. She didn't say anything to him, just went to the kitchen and poured herself a coffee. She took a mouthful of the hot drink, watching him the whole time. Eventually, he spoke.

'I'm going back to Edge today,' he said, and the challenge was obvious. She smiled slightly.

'Really.'

He sighed. 'You had everything with us.'

She shrugged. 'Everything except a clear conscience.'

'Things are better now. Truly.' She heard something close to begging in his voice, and it made her uncomfortable.

'I'm happy here.'

'You're not.'

'I'm not coming back.'

He let out a cry of frustration. 'Elena, for fuck's sake, you don't belong here.'

She shrugged, only frustrating him further. 'I'm happy,' she said again.

Reno stood. 'Last night-'

'Was just sex,' she cut him off, smoothly.

He stared at her for a second. 'That's not what I was going to say,' he said, quietly. 'Last night, you asked me about Midgar...'

'I don't wanna know,' she said faintly. 'I, I don't care.'

A sad smile spread across his face. Oh, she cared alright. He shrugged. 'I guess I'll be seeing you then.'

'Probably not.'

Reno swallowed hard. 'I really love you, Elena,' he said softly.

She made herself look him right in the eye. 'I don't love you,' she said, voice steady. She only let her gaze drop when the slam of the door behind her let her know he'd gone.

xoxoxoxo

_'Lena, pleeease.'_

_The whining tone in his voice, meant to be endearing, was just aggravating. But somehow she still found herself relenting._

_'Fine. One drink.'_

_He threw his arms around her, pulling her into a dance. Against her will, she began to laugh. _

_'Grow up,' she told him, through giggles. He didn't reply, just wrapped his thin fingers round hers, tugging her to the bar. _

_When he'd bought them drinks, and they were sat at a little table in the corner, she shook her head. 'Our lives are forfeit if Tseng finds out we were drinking on the job.'_

_Reno snorted. 'Haven't you ever wondered what the Wutain Wonder carries around in that flask of his? 'Cause it sure as hell ain't tea.'_

_'Wutain Wonder?' Elena had to laugh at that. 'Do you take anything seriously, Reno?'_

_'I take plenty seriously,' he protested, eyes wide and cute looking. He leaned forward and kissed her, unexpectedly. 'I take women very seriously,' he grinned._

_'Reno! Get the hell off me, perve! God, no wonder you don't have a girlfriend.'_

_He just laughed. 'Whatever, Lena. I know you felt something.'_

_Elena snorted a __bit, rolling__ her eyes. He didn't fail to notice, however, that she downed her whole drink__ in one go, to try and__ hide the blush that__ suddenly__ covered her cheeks._

A/N- That wasn't that easy to write, so again, feedback would be appreciated. The last bit was a flashback, to try and show how they used to be friends, so yeah. The next chapter is longer and happier, as Reno generally makes a fool of himself, and Elena does what she does best- drop herself in it by saying waaaayyyy too much at _totally _the wrong time. But that's why we love her, no? Anyway, review pretty please?


	6. Friends

Chapter Six

Then

Two weeks had passed since the Sector Seven Plate had fallen. Elena didn't think she'd had chance to breathe that whole time. The following evening, AVALANCHE had invaded the building... and then so had Sephiroth. Elena had been in the infirmary keeping Reno company yet again when they'd found out that the bizarre, frightening General had been, killing countless people... including the President. To her shock, when Reno found out he was dead, he snorted with laughter.

'Reno!' She smacked him on the head, eiciting a yelp. It was funny, she mused, how quickly one became comfortable with Reno. She would never be able to whack Rude, and Tseng, well... it didn't bear thinking of. But Reno she had no qualms about hitting.

'Ow! I'm injured, yo!'

'The President is dead and you just laugh! That's awful.'

He rolled his eyes. 'You never met the guy, did you?'

Elena shook her head. 'No, but...'

'He was an asshole. A bigoted, selfish asshole. He's really no loss. Now, all the other people that died, I'm very sorry for them. But truly, I couldn't care less about the guy.'

Elena bit her lip, unsure what to say to that. 'At least the other Turks are okay,' she offered in a small voice.

Reno smiled at her. 'Exactly,' he said approvingly.

Elena shuddered. 'I can't believe Sephiroth was here... in the building...'

Reno became serious for a moment. 'I know. It's freaky shit.' He shook his head. 'Almost makes me glad to be stuck in here, out of the action. I'm _definitely _glad you were in here with me.'

She flushed. 'Th,thank you,' she said.

'Don't be so weak,' teased Reno. 'You're a Turk. Act like one.'

'What, drunk?' she joked.

He threw a bunch of grapes at her. 'Ha ha.' His expression darkened. 'Man, I could do with a drink.'

Rolling her eyes, Elena grumbled 'Wait a second.' She went over to her jacket, which was lying over a silver bag. From the bag she withdrew a bottle of vodka, the posh crap that had a blade of grass in it.

'It was a gift from the other cadets,' she said. 'You know, for becoming a Turk.'

There was look of purest joy on Reno's face. 'Lena, you're a goddess!'

'Don't have too much!' she cautioned him.

He opened the bottle, taking a swig. He closed his eyes, a blissful expression on his face. He then passed the bottle to her. She shook her head, but he pressed it into her hands.

'We've had a stressful experience,' he insisted. 'Come on, rookie...'

She glared at him, the forced down a mouthful of the aromatic drink. Reno shrieked with laughter at her face.

'Aw, man, was that the first time you've had a drink?'

'No!' snapped Elena, red faced. 'I just don't like vodka much.'

'Lena, honey. This isn't vodka. This is _nectar_.'

She rolled her eyes. 'Shitty tasting nectar,' she muttered. He just laughed, downing more. 'So... what happens next?' Elena asked him.

He shrugged, frowning thoughtfully. 'Rufus'll take over, I imagine.' He made a face. 'Man, Rufus is just as bad as his old man, in his way.'

Elena bit her lip. 'What do you mean?' she asked, worriedly.

'Well,' Reno seemed to consider, swallowing the vodka as though it was water. 'Well. Rufus is pretty cold. You know the shtick about him not bleeding and crying, right? He's also majorly antisocial- he just hangs round with that freakin' cat the whole time.'

'Dark Nation is a panther,' Elena pointed out mockingly.

Reno stuck his tongue out at her. 'Nyah. But... I dunno. I can't say I'm too fond of Ruf. The Prez tried to make us buddies, when I first became a Turk. We're almost exactly the same age, so the Prez thought I could, I dunno, make Rufus more normal or something.' He shivered. 'I think Rufus thought I was coming onto him when I invited him for a drink.'

'Wait,' Elena shook her head. 'Didn't you become a Turk when you were, like, fifteen?'

Reno nodded. 'Yeah. Why?'

'I didn't touch booze til I was, like, nineteen!'

Reno burst out laughing. 'Lena, you're nineteen now. That totally _was _your first drink!'

She glared at him, cheeks crimson with embarassment. 'Shut up!'

Reno smiled at her, ruffling her hair surprisingly gently. 'I'm teasing, yo.'

She blushed harder. 'Whatever,' she mumbled.

A devilish grin spread over his face. 'Aw, Lena... smile, or I'll...' He threw himself on her suddenly, tickling her mercilessly.

'Reno!' she shrieked. But she couldn't stop giggling. 'Reno... please... stop...' He shook his head, grabbing her hands with one of his, pinning her. 'RENO!!!'

The door opened, revealing a very angry looking nurse. 'There was a _massacre _here earlier!' she hissed. 'Would you please show some respect to the dead and stop _flirting_?!' She caught sight of the vodka, and her eyes narrowed. 'For gods sake, Reno. You're on painkillers.' Shaking her head, she picked the bottle up, then left, glaring the whole way.

Red faced, hair a mess, Elena sat up, then promptly hit Reno. He just laughed.

xoxoxoxo

And so, two weeks after the massacre, Elena received her first real mission- to intercept AVALANCHE, before continuing to Junon where they would hopefully dispose of Sephiroth in time for Rufus' inauguration ceremony. Reno was travelling on with Rufus, to act as some kind of protection, though his injuries weren't entirely healed. He was in a vile mood when they set off, bitching and whining for all he was worth.

'We're not bodyguards,' he moaned. He gazed at Tseng, trying to look beseeching. 'Lemme go after AVALANCHE. I wanna settle the score.'

Tseng rolled his eyes. 'Reno, you barely made a mark on them when at full strength, let alone when you can barely move your arm. Be patient.'

Reno pouted. 'But Tseeeng...'

'No. You're going to Junon with Rufus. We're not going to fight them, anyway. Our main concern right now is Sephiroth.'

'But...'

'Reno.' Rude rarely spoke, but when he did, he meant it. Reno sighed theatrically, and crossed his arms, but he shut up.

_Finally,_ thought Elena, leaning back in her seat a bit. She was fond of Reno, very fond. But she'd spent so much time with him over the last few weeks, and he was so... full on. Always chattering, and joking and trying to pull pranks. Sometimes she just wanted to knock him out, or gag him or, when he was being particularly annoying, give him to Hojo for a while. The main problem with him, was that he didn't seem to have any idea when to shut up, as he was displaying now.

'Stupid dumb mission... stupid dumb Junon,' he was muttering under his breath.

'RENO!' Tseng finally snapped. 'Shut the hell up!'

Elena hid a smile as Reno slumped down in his seat, glaring like a toddler. He didn't say another word 'til they landed near the Mythril Mines, where Sephiroth was apparently headed. They stopped outside for a moment, just staring. The Midgar Zolom, a serpent-esque creature that lived in the marshes outside the mines, was impaled on a huge spike, bloo, pouring down it's side, jaws frozen in a noiseless cry. Elena felt her stomach twist. Beside her, Rude laughed slightly.

'Go on in,' said Tseng. 'Check the area. I'll contact HQ.'

Elena and Rude nodded, heading into the caves. After a moment, Rude grunted. 'Wait,' he said, softly.

Elena looked down. Cloud, that was his name, wasn't it? was there with two young women. They were talking. She turned to Rude, but he was gone. She looked down. He was there now, standing in front of them.

'Just a second,' he said.

One of the women jumped. 'Who are you?' She stepped back a bit, her long dark hair stirring in the breeze.

'From the Turks,' said Cloud, understanding on his face.

'Well if you know, this won't take long,' said Rude, business-like as usual. 'It's difficult to explain what the Turks do...'

'Kidnapping, right?' siad Cloud, sneeringly.

Rude shrugged. 'To put it negatively... you could say that...But, that's not all there is to it, anymore.' He looked at the floor. Elena realised this was her time.

'Sir! It's all right, Rude! I know you don't like speeches, so don't force it!"

Rude looked almost amused. 'Then Elena, explain.'

'I'm the newest member of the Turks. Thanks to what you did to Reno, we're short of people.' She thought for a second. 'Though, because of that I got promoted...' _Elena, come on! _'Our job is to find out where Sephiroth is headed, and stop you every step of the way!' _Wait, that sounds like they're ahead of us... _ 'No. You're the ones that are getting in _our _way!'

Tseng came in, rolling his eyes. 'Elena, you talk too much.'

'Tseng?!' _Aw crap..._

'No need to tell them our orders,' he said, smoothly.

'Sorry, Tseng.'

'Go,' he instructed them.

'Right!' Elena was desperated to redeem herself. 'Rude and I will go to Junon, where Sephiroth is headed!' _Are you terminally stupid?!_

Tseng glared at her. 'Elena,' he said pointedly. 'You don't seem to understand.'

She turned crimson. 'I'm sorry,' she squeaked.

'Go. Don't let Sephiroth get away.'

She nodded, then ran to the exit, feeling like an idiot. Behind her, she heard Rude telling them how much Reno was looking forward to getting his revenge, but her ears were pounding so much she didn't hear their response. She'd made fools of them on her very first mission. _Nice going, idiot._

xoxoxoxo

'It's not that bad,' said Reno later, as they sat on the balcony of one of Rufus' ships. Reno's arm had been hurting, and Elena had been given an extended lunch break, (Turk speak for the fact she was too useless to do anything except sit in the sun, twiddling her thumbs) so they were just sitting around, doing very little. Reno had been complaining about how he was going to get sunburn, ehrn he'd noticed how down Elena looked, and made it his personal mission to cheer her up.

'Really,' she said, glumly.

'My first mission was _way _worse. I nearly caused an international incident!'

She gave him a Look. 'Whatever, Reno.'

'S'true!' he said, looking wounded. 'I was crap! I insulted the Midean Ambassador to Midgar, got drunk off one glass of saké, then insulted Wutai right in front of Tseng- who wasn't amused, lemme tell you. Then I passed out, next to the President's limo. So nyah. I beat you.'

Elena rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh. 'Fine. You win. But my first mission was till pretty awful.'

He shrugged. 'You'll do better next time. And it really doesn't sound so bad. Really.'

She sighed. 'I guess...'

'Don't worry. Tseng'll get over it pretty quick. He's never stayed mad at anyone before, and I doubt he'll start with you.'

Elena began to feel cheered. Renon was right. It hadn't been that bad. Embarassing more than anything. For now, she may as well try and stop thinking about it. 'It's a nice day,' she remarked. Then she caught sight of his face, and burst into laughter. 'Aw, Reno, you're freckling!' she squealed. _That _cheered her no end.

'What?! Tell me you're kidding,' he pleaded.

She shook her head, grinning. 'Nuh uh. You got 'em here, here,' she pointed out all the little freckles that had appeared on his pale skin. 'They're cute,' she told him, knowing it would annoy him.

'Lena!' He glared at her. 'Come on, we're going in.' He shook his head. 'Damn freckles.'

She rolled her eyes, but followed him inside, into the tiny room that was the only one on the ship they were allowed into. It was dim and cool, a nice tonic to Junon's hot sun. Reno threw himself onto the couch. She sat beside him, rather more sedately. There was comfortable silence for a while, as Elena read a weapons magazine that had been left on the floor, and Reno sat with his eyes closed, apparently dosing. After a while though, he looked at her.

'I'm bored,' he announced.

'Mm hm.' She didn't look up from her magazine. Reno was like a child- ignore him, and eventually he'll shut up. Or at least, you _really _hope he will.

'You know what we should do?'

'Mm?' She was reading an article about bullet weight, and didn't care what he thought they should do.

'Have sex,' he said.

She dropped the magazine. 'What?!'

He nodded, apparently serious. 'We've got a while to kill, nothing to do...' he winked at her. 'Plus, there's all this sexual tension in the room...'

Elena blushed. He was joking, she _thought_ he was joking, but that last statement was a little _too _close to the truth. It seemed that whenever she was with Reno, there _was _this... atmosphere. She was sure it was just on her part, after all, what would Reno want with someone like _her_, when he was so good-looking and charming he could get anyone? But... the thought that he might have sensed her crush on him was... embarassing. She rolled her eyes, willed her voice to sound normal.

'No, Reno,' she said, sighing.

'Aw, come on. It'd be fun!'

She picked up her magazine. 'No.' He fluttered his eyelids at her. '_NO!' _

Reno sighed. 'Fine,' he said petulantly. After a minute, he stretched out across the couch, laying his feet in Elena's lap. 'Wake me up if anyone comes in,' he instructed her. He was alseep in seconds.

She glared down at his feet, but couldn't help the little smile that crossed her face. Being a Turk was great- a dream come true. But she had to admit, the best thing about it so far, was most definitely meeting Reno.

A/N- I think this was less angsty lol. The next couple of flashback chapters will be. The pther chapters, erm, won't be lol. Please review XD


	7. Identity

Chapter Seven

Now

For three weeks, Elena worked all day and drank all night. The second she finished her shift at the hospital, she went straight back to her house, changed her clothes and went to the bar. Almost every night she went home with a man. Sometimes she saw them a couple of times, when she couldn't be bothered to find someone new, but mostly she went with different guys. The one cardinal rule she stuck to was that she never told them her real name, or where she lived. It was fun in a way, thinking up a new identity for herself every night, creating a character who'd never come across Shinra, or Reno. One night she was Alexandra, a student from Mideel, visiting family. The next night she was Julia, a young lawyer from Nibelheim in Junon on business. If the men suspected anything, they never said- Elena was young and blonde and didn't want a second date. No man would question that.

Until one night, when she was sitting by herself, and a man approached her. There was something familiar about him, though she couldn't place it at first. He was tall, with quite dark skin, dark hair, green eyes. He was handsome, but not amazingly so. His face was a little bland, his shoulders rather too narrow for his stocky build, but there was something about him, nonetheless. Elena always thought there were two kinds of good-looking men- the absolute perfection of guys like Tseng, who were unfair representations because only about three percent of men in the world were that beautiful, and then the imperfect but somehow comforting guys, like the one before her. Reno... well, he fell into neither category. As with so many other aspects of life, he was a law unto himself.

She looked at the man, who was smiling broadly at her.

'Hi, Elena right?' he asked her, still smiling.

Elena felt all her defences go up. Who was this man? How did he know her name?

'We met here, a few weeks ago?' he said, in reply to her unspoken question.

She still said nothing. The man laughed slightly. 'I'm Nikolai.'

Elena shifted uncomfortably, not wanting to be rude, but not wanting to engage. 'I don't remember meeting, I'm sorry,' she said, politely.

He smiled. 'You had drunk a little bit, I think.'

She glared slightly. 'I'm sorry, I'm meeting someone,' she said, pointedly.

Nikolai sat down beside her. She rolled her eyes, trying to ignore him.

'It is Elena, right? I'm sorry, I'm awful with names.'

She sighed, seeing she wasn't getting rid of him anytime soon. 'Yes. It's Elena.'

'What do you do, Elena?'

She bit her lip, unsure what answer to give. Nikolai saw her hesitation and laughed. 'You can lie if you want.'

Elena found herself laughing. 'Okay. I'm an astronaut.'

Nikolai nodded, seriously. 'Wow. That must be exciting, hm?'

She rolled her eyes again, still grinning slightly. 'Very.' She looked at him, a little closer. He had a kind face, and a nice smile, and his hair couldn't physically have been any less red. 'What do you do?' she asked, impulsively.

'I work for the Junon Times. Assistant editor.' The Junon Times was a pretty big deal, but he said this with no sense of bragging, and Elena believed him completely.

'You're a big shot, huh?'

He smiled. 'Not really. Our local interest stories have really dwindled since just after Meteor. Midgar's where the news is these days.'

Elena snorted slightly. 'Edge, you mean.'

He nodded, a sad look on his face. 'What an awful place. When I think of what's happening there... I'm glad we don't have any big news here.'

Elena gazed at him for a second, a little smile on her. 'That's true,' she said, softly.

xoxoxoxo

Elena and Nikolai went for dinner a few days later, and then to see the movie of 'Loveless' couple of days after that. After their next date, they slept together for the first time, and on the date after that Elena let him come back to her house.

When she was with him, there were no sparks of chemistry, no moments when he touched her innocently and she gasped like her breath had been stolen. She wasn't in love with him, nor did she envisage ever being that way. But she _liked _him. He made her happy, and it was such a long time since she'd been truly happy that it made it easier to pretend she was falling for him. He certainly seemed to have fallen for her, and it was so nice to be with someone who was so open, whose every emotion was written on their face. She started to look forward to every moment she spent with him.

Her colleagues at work noticed the change in her. They kept making little gestures that they'd never bothered making before, because no-one had liked her that much. They thought she was cold and hard, and most also suspected that she'd gotten such a good contract due to her former position as a Turk, something they were probably right about. But now... she was invited on their nights out. When people made coffee, they poured her one too. On cigarette breaks, the others offered her their lighters. They were just little things, but they made such a difference. Elena felt herself relaxing around people, talking more easily, smiling most of the time. She had gone from being bitter and lonely, just as Reno said she was, to feeling lighter and freer, if not happier, than she ever had.

xoxoxoxo

She was lying in Nikolai's arms, bare skin pressed to bare skin. The window was open, letting in the mild breeze. She felt content, safe.

Nikolai pressed a kiss to her shoulder, making her smile.

'Laney,' he murmured into her skin, using his own pet name for her. She wasn't mad about it, but as long as he didn't call her 'Lena', she didn't really care.

'Mm?'

There was a pause. 'Have you ever been in love before?'

Elena stiffened. 'In love?' Reno's face flashed into her mind. She pushed it away as best she could, tried to say 'No, not really,' but her voice betrayed her.

'You have,' he said softly. His tone was not pressing, but there was a certain amount of curiosity in it.

She sighed. 'I...maybe,' she conceded. 'But I'm not...' she trailed off. 'I don't really think about it anymore.'

'He was from Midgar?'

Elena had reluctantly told him where she came from, when she was drunk and his tongue had been doing things to her that made her lose her senses. She regretted it now, wishing she had told him she was from Rocket Town, or somewhere completely unrelated to her former life. After all, who was going to tell him otherwise?

'Yeah. We... worked together.'

'You were a nurse in Midgar?'

She shook her head. 'Honey, I'm tired. I'll tell you another time, okay?'

He smiled. 'It's okay. We have time,' he told her, kissing her again.

She smiled at him, wishing not for the first time that she could fall in love with him. He was almost the perfect man. In fact, for anyone else he probably would have been. All Elena could do was keep trying, and just appreciate the fact that he was with her, making her happy.

The next evening, she was making them dinner, when Nikolai came in, a funny look on his face.

She smiled at him. 'Hey, hon. I made pasta.'

He didn't reply. In a voice that didn't sound like his own, he asked 'What did you do in Midgar?'

'Hmm?' She looked at him, surprised. 'My job?'

'Were you a Turk?' he asked, bluntly.

She opened her mouth, closed it again. Then she took a deep breath. 'How did you find out?' she asked, softly. She saw no sense in denying it.

'I was looking through the archives, found your name as a reference point. Elena, sister of Rosalind, another Turk. Daughter of an instructor at the Military Academy that trains Turks...' he recited it, as though he'd been reading the same words over and over again. 'Shinra in the blood,' he hissed, sounding disgusted.

'I... I left Shinra,' she told him. 'I want nothing to do with them anymore.'

He shook his head, seeming not to listen to her. 'You murdered people, kidnapped them, maimed them... you can't leave that behind, Elena.' Her name sounded like dirt. He was _looking _at her like she was dirt. 'You make me sick,' he told her.

She felt tears fill her eyes. 'Nikolai, please, I-'

He cut her off. 'I never want to see you again,' he told her. 'You murdering bitch.'

She flinched. 'Nikolai...'

His eyes narrowed. 'You're disgusting,' he told her. And then he left, without another look back.

Elena stared at the door where he'd just been. She wished that he'd shouted, or hit her, or done anything rather than talk to her like she was...

She swallowed hard. _Who she was_Elena was everything that Nikolai had said. A murderer, a liar, the scum of the earth.

_I am a Turk._

And for the first time in a long while, Elena knew what she had to do. She had to go back to Edge.

A/N- yeah, kinda angsty lol. But it gets happier. Kinda lol. Anyway, I think there's five more chapters to this. The next one will be up soon, featuring the Turks gossiping, and Rude getting his ass wupped. Please review XD


	8. Immature

Chapter Eight

Then

Reno had recovered enough to return to work, but the other Turks were already starting to wish he hadn't. Their main assignment at the moment was to track Sephiroth, something Reno was not happy about.

'What about AVALANCHE?' he whined, slumping dramatically in his seat as Tseng gave them their orders. They were going to Gongaga with Scarlet, to try and find any materia that was still within the reactors, for the Weapon's Development team to use in their quest to build the ultimate weapon. A quest that Tseng thought was doomed, but hell, he would never say that straight to Scarlet's face. That woman sure could slap.

He sighed. 'Actually Reno, you're in luck for once.'

Reno sat up straighter. 'I am?'

'Yes. We've heard from Reeve that they'll be heading to Gongaga next, and we don't want them getting in Scarlet's way. You need to go there and hold them up for a bit.'

Reno looked jubilant. 'No kidding? So I can finally get 'em back for Sector Seven?'

Tseng shrugged. 'You can try. You're still not one hundred percent though, so don't worry if you can't finish them off.'

Reno pouted. 'I'm gonna kick their asses,' he muttered under his breath.

Elena smiled at him, then turned to Tseng. 'How is it going with Reeve? They don't suspect anything?'

Tseng shook his head. 'They don't seem to. I have to admit, I thought it was a ridiculous idea at first. I mean... a fortune telling moogle? That just happens to have a vendetta against Sephiroth? But... it seems to be working. We'd never have known where they were going if not for Cait. And the little machine's doing a pretty good job.'

'Shinra technology at its finest,' Elena agreed. 'So, when do we leave?'

'Imminently,' replied Tseng. 'The chopper's just being refuelled, then we're off.' He checked his watch. 'I better go make sure Scarlet's ready,' he said, making a face. 'Meet on the helipad in ten minutes.'

The three Turks nodded. When Tseng was gone, Reno stuck his tongue out at the door. 'Jerk,' he muttered.

'Reno! God, have some respect,' Elena scolded him, shaking her head. 'Tseng was just stating a fact. You're not in your best shape at the moment.'

Rude raised an eyebrow, unnoticed by Elena. Reno made a face. 'I am gonna get them though.'

'Of course you will. At some point.'

He glared at her. 'Thanks for the vote of confidence, _Lena_.'

She stuck her tongue out at him, and for a second they were just glaring at each other, but then Elena couldn't keep it up any longer, and burst into laughter.

'Ha!' crowed Reno. 'Lena, try as you might, you will never outstare me!'

Rude rolled his eyes. He felt as though he was working with children sometimes. Maybe it was to be expected from Elena. She was only twenty one, had never even graduated from the Academy. And she wasn't that bad, compared to Reno. At twenty two, and having been a Turk for nearly seven years, you'd think he'd have grown out of things like staring contests. But no. He'd challenged Elena to one at the infirmary on pretty much the first day he'd met her, and it had been a running thing since then. Along with arm wrestling, and even goddamn thumb wars. Rude wished the two of them would just give in and screw already. Did they not realise how obvious the underlying tension between them was? The fact that they were constantly touching each other, staring at each other... though... Rude frowned suddenly. He'd seen Elena gazing at Tseng earlier. Did she like him too? He had a feeling Tseng liked her, because he had yet to lose his temper with her. That was a big thing with him. He had a very short tolerance, and it usually took very little to set him off. But even when Elena had blurted their orders to AVALANCHE, Tseng had remained pretty calm, not even mentioning the incident again. If Reno, or even Rude, had done the same, they would have gotten the telling off to end all telling offs. But not Elena...

Rude sighed. It was trying sometimes, working in such an intense atmosphere. He couldn't remember a day in the last year where he hadn't seen at least one Turk. They spent so much time together, it was no wonder they all ended up falling for each other. Rude smiled slightly. Not him though. He had his eyes on someone else, and even though there was little chance of it ever coming to anything... well. He could dream, right?

He was shaken from his reverie, by a shriek from Elena. Reno had her pinned to the wall, and was trying to liberate her ID badge.

'Reno, no! I hate that picture! Please...' Her pleas were somewhat softened by the fact that she was barely able to breathe as she was laughing so much.

Rude stood. 'We've gotta go,' he pointed out.

Reno sighed. 'Fine. I'll get it another time,' he warned Elena, before releasing her. She punched him, hard, in the stomach, leaving him rolling on the floor.

'We'll see,' she sang. Rude smiled slightly as Reno groaned.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

When they reached Gongaga, Reno and Rude waited in the little clearing just outside the town, whilst Elena checked the perimeter. It was boring just standing around. Reno was not good at doing nothing, so he turned to Rude.

'Who do you like?' he asked him, grinning. This was one of their favorite topics of conversation, or Reno's at least. It was a good way to kill time, especially as you usually had to wheedle it out of Rude.

He turned away, shrugging. Reno burst out laughing. 'What are you getting so embarrassed about? Come on, who do you like?'

Rude sighed. '... Tifa,' he admitted, reluctantly.

Reno grinned. Hmm, what could he possibly see in Tifa? Must be her huge, ahem _personality. _He shook his head. 'Hmm. That's a tough one.' He couldn't resist messing around a bit. 'But, poor Elena... she, you...'

Rude gave Reno a look. 'Ha ha. No, she likes Tseng.' He meant it as a joke, but he saw Reno's face fall slightly.

'I never knew that,' he said, voice slightly strained. 'But Tseng likes that Ancient...'

Elena was coming up the path when she heard them talking. She barely noticed Cloud just ahead of her. She was smarting. Why would Rude say that? She didn't like Tseng! She... liked Reno. As weird as it was to admit it. She sighed. Reno hadn't even sounded bothered when Rude had said it though. And he'd thought something was going on with her and Rude, and he hadn't seemed to care about that, either. Elena suddenly felt very low. A voice ahead of her said 'What are they talking about?'

Automatically, she found herself answering. 'It's so stupid. They always talk about who they like or don't like.' She sighed. 'Tseng is different, he...' Her head suddenly snapped up, and she realized who she was talking to. 'Cloud! They're really here!'

She ran to Reno and Rude. 'They're here!'

Reno nodded, going all business like suddenly. 'Then it's time...' He turned to Rude. 'Don't go easy on them, even though they're girls.'

Rude nodded. 'I'll do my job.'

'Then we're counting on you,' Elena told them. 'I'll report to Tseng.'

She ran towards the chopper, stopping only to blast the opportunistic monsters that came after her. When she reached it, she found Tseng and Scarlet sitting within.

'Reno and Rude are with AVALANCHE,' she told them.

Tseng nodded. 'Okay. Let's go. 'He signalled to the pilot, and the chopper lifted into the air. Elena sat staring out the window, wondering why she felt so crappy. Had she really thought there could be anything between her and Reno? She was just a stupid little kid.

Tseng watched her, frowning. 'Are you okay, Elena?'

She smiled weakly. 'I'm fine. Just tired.'

He smiled at her. 'Thing's will quiet down soon,' he assured her. 'It's been pretty tough so far, hmm?'

She nodded. 'Yeah,' she said softly. 'It has.'

xoxoxoxoxoxo

For the next couple of weeks, the Turks had very little to do, but Tseng made them spend time doing administrative duties and training, to make sure that they were ready and available at a moment's notice. Elena wasn't sure, but it felt as though something had changed since the trip to Gongaga. Reno was still probably the easiest person to get along with, but their relationship was far less jokey than it had been. It was odd, she almost felt as though Reno was being as careful with her as she was with him, though she couldn't work out for the life of her why he would be. She was a bit sad that their friendship seemed less close. She'd never had a really good friend before. Not until Reno.

Nearly three weeks later, they were sent to Rocket Town, along with Rufus and Palmer, to retrieve a plane that Rufus wanted. Reeve had apparently contacted them about a place called the Temple of the Ancients, which AVALANCHE was trying to find, that was on a remote continent. Rufus thought they'd have a better chance of getting there by plane than by helicopter, and so here they were, in Rocket Town, or the asshole of the universe, as Reno had named it. Rude was backing up Palmer; Rufus was sitting in the chopper, bitching at Tseng; Reno and Elena... were sitting in a field just outside the town. Bored out of their skulls.

Rufus had decided that the two youngest Turks lacked the subtlety and finesse required for this mission, and so they would be back-up, should Rude need it. Reno was seething.

'Finesse? They're stealing a plane off some has been fucking pilot! How will they be using _finesse_?!'

Elena shrugged, wrinkling her nose as a bee flew awfully close to her head. 'I don't know. Maybe they're gonna try and get the plane without any bloodshed, for once.'

Reno snorted. 'I doubt it. Rufus doesn't do negotiations. Rufus whacks people into submission, then does what he wants with them.'

'Actually, that's true,' said Elena. She sighed. 'They clearly just don't trust me, and they're making you look after me, probably 'cause of those water balloons the other week.'

Reno pouted. 'It was a hot day,' he muttered. 'I thought people would appreciate it.'

Elena rolled her eyes, smiling. 'Well, they didn't.' She looked around. Nothing but grass, for at least half a mile around them. Grass and the blue sky. 'We may as well make the best of it. This is the closest we're gonna get to a vacation for the time being.'

'I guess.' Reno was in one of those moods, where pretty much nothing was going to cheer him up. Elena decided this just was not good enough, if she was going to have to sit here with him for god only knew how long. She plucked some grass and threw it at him, hitting him square in the face.

'Hey!' He spat the green blades from his mouth, glaring at her. 'Grow up, Elena!'

Elena opened her mouth in feigned shock. 'You're telling _me _to grow up?' She threw more grass at him.

'LENA!'

She blinked innocently. 'What?' she asked, the challenge clear in her voice.

Reno's eyes narrowed, humor glinting in them. 'You're gonna pay,' he told her. She leapt up, and started to run across the field, but Reno wasn't called the fastest Turk for nothing. He caught up to her in a matter of seconds, pulling her to the ground and dropping a handful of grass into her face, before pinning her down. Screaming with laughter, Elena begged him to let her go.

'What was that Elena? Did you say please?'

'Y,yes,' she choked out, between giggles. Reno let her go, smiling. Elena smiled back, glad he was being normal with her. She decided to risk the peace, by asking him about what he and Rude had been talking about, all those weeks ago.

'You know when we were in Gongaga, a couple weeks ago?'

Reno nodded, frowning slightly. 'Yeah.'

'I heard you and Rude talking. I never knew he liked Tifa!'

Reno shrugged. 'I know. She is hot, I guess. Didn't think she was Rude's type though.' He looked up at the sky. 'I didn't know you liked Tseng.'

Elena blushed. 'I don't, I mean... I like him, a lot... erm, you know, but...'

Reno cut her off. 'You don't need to be embarrassed,' he said, smiling slightly.

Elena frowned, watching him out of the corner of her eye. 'What about you, Reno? Who do _you _like?'

'Me?' Reno looked away. 'I like Rude,' he said in a high pitched voice.

Elena whacked him. 'Ha ha. No, I'm serious. Who do you like?'

Reno just shrugged. 'It doesn't matter,' he said, standing. 'Look, there's Rude now. Ya think I should ask him out?'

Elena glared at him, then stared at Rude. 'He's walkin' kinda funny, isn't he,' she remarked. As he got closer, they saw he was covered in cuts and bruises. Even with his sunglasses on his face, a black eye was beginning to show. Reno winced.

'AVALANCHE, huh?'

'...' Rude grunted. 'No.'

Reno raised an eyebrow. 'No?'

'...' Rude sighed. 'Palmer got hit by a truck. I tripped over him.'

Reno and Elena stared at him for a moment before collapsing to the ground in hysterics. Rude just glared at them.

'Idiots,' he muttered, though he couldn't help smiling at the sight of them, rolling around in the meadow, laughing til they could barely breathe.

A/N- lol I know Rude doesn't go to Rocket Town until later, but I wanted to start getting things moving. In the next chapter, Elena goes back to Edge. But will she and Reno be reunited? After that, the Turks go on holiday- sun, booze, pimps and ninjas: the hallmarks of any good vacation :-p. Please review XD


	9. Forgiveness

A/N- there's some not so nice stuff in this chapter

Chapter Nine

Now/Then

Elena slept on the flight to Edge, thanks to the Valium she'd stolen from the hospital in Junon. It took about three hours to get there, so she'd gone business class, not wanting to be crammed into an economy seat for any extended length of time. With a wry smile, she remembered travelling with Shinra- always the best of the best for the Turks. The newest choppers, the comfiest planes, the fastest cars. Rude and Tseng were both gadget freaks and Elena could remember hours of listening to them discuss suspension and velocity, and other fascinating things that she never would be interested in. When it got particularly boring, she would sleep on Reno's bony shoulder, always waking with a sore cheek. She sighed. She never slept better than when Reno was there...

She had just one bag with her. Unlike most women, Elena travelled light, and all she'd bought with her was a change of clothes. If the worst came to the worst, she could borrow things off her older sister. They were about the same size, though Elena was rather taller than Rosalind. Elena had other things on her mind, anyway.

It was cold in Edge. Much colder than Midgar had ever been, but then Midgar was permanently filled with smog and pollution. No, here it was cool, and always slightly dim, as though the sun didn't want to come near anymore. Elena stepped out of the airport, ignoring the honking taxis who all waned to take this obviously affluent women somewhere. Where she wanted to be was not far, certainly within walking distance. She could see it from here as she stood on the street, the imposing glass domes, and granite posts, the sign, not much different from the old days, only it was simpler now. The Shinra Electric Power Company was now just Neo-Shinra, it's logo Meteor being burnt up by the Lifestream, a symbol that distanced them from the Shinra of old. Neo Shinra made a lot of it's ties to AVALANCHE, the fact that one of Shinra's main officials had fought alongside them in the final battle against Sephiroth. Elena felt a shiver run down her spine. _New Shinra, sure... but what we did..._

xoxoxoxoxo

_The children didn't scream when Reno and Elena came in. Perhaps they were too tired? Or maybe they thought if they were well behaved, quiet, then they would be spared_

_They wouldn't be. Elena knew that. Reno did too. They had guns in the__ir__ pockets, enough bullets for every little face in the room. 'A humanitarian act,' that was what Rufus was calling it. These were the people injured in Meteorfall, the ones for whom there wasn't enough supplies, the ones who were suffering__, who had been using up the funds of the city for the last two years and who weren't geting any better__. 'It's not fair on them,' Rufus had told the two, gently. 'They can't recover. This is the only way for them to find peace...'_

_The men had been disposed of by Rude. There were less of them; it only took forty minutes to get rid of them all. __Rude had been stone faced as ever when he'd emerged, never letting on the pain it must have caused him. It _had _to have hurt him, right? thought Elena, desperately. Because if it hadn't hurt him, then..._

_Tseng had killed the women, the biggest group. It had taken hours, and the screams had filled the building, echoing around. It sounded like hell. Tseng had come out, and been instantly, violently sick, __and then gone straight back to normal__, because he was a good employee and because, Elena feared, he didn't have a heart. This was the man who had shrugged, looked bored, even laughed as the Sector Seven Plate fell, killing god only knew how many, after all. Elena fel__t ill when she looked at him__, but then he'd caught her eye, and she'd seen it in him. He had a heart all right- o__ne that was being shattered ever more violently, each__ day he stayed at Shinra. Why doesn't he leave? Elena __wondered. The same reason she didn't. These people were her family, sick and twisted though they were._

_She stared around__ the__ room, then at Reno. Her eyes pleaded with him, but she knew there was no use. Reno didn't go against orders, did he? And to the guy who dropped the Sector Seven Plate, this was small potatoes. She swallowed hard as he ordered the children into lines, facing the walls. She watched him, his jaw set, hands not even shaking, as he lifted the gun and shot the first victim, a little girl with a broken leg. The other children became to scream and cry. Reno licked his lips, braced his shoulders, shot again. He's been inside me, though Elena, gazing at Reno. He's seen every part of me, touched every part of me, done things to me that make me blush to think of them... _

_'Lena! Go to the other end,' he snapped. There was a fleck of blood on his cheek. _

_**And I don't know him at all...**_

_Elena lifted her gun, trying to detach herself from the situation, even as her bullet ripped through the kid's skull. They were trained killers. The children would feel no pain. But Reno and Elena themselves would never recover. Elena knew that she would fall asleep to the anguished cries, the heartbroken sobs. They would be as much a part of her as her blonde hair, or her brown eyes, or the star shaped birthmark on the inside of her thigh, that Reno had discovered for her. Even if no-one ev__e__r knew what happened to these people__, that it was her that had killed them, __**she **__would know. _

_But she would never have to do it again._

_The following day she left Edge, she thought for good. She didn't say goodbye to anyone, as much as it hurt her. Reno, Tseng, Rude, Rosalind, Shinra... She swore she would never look back, that she would do everything she possibly could, so that one day she could think of herself as Elena again, and not The Woman Who Helped in The Purges. Even if it meant never seeing her friends again. _

_She didn't let herself cry, not even when she was alone in a crappy hotel room in Junon that only had one pillow, and no bulbs in the lamps. She didn't deserve tears, the cathartic effect they had. She didn't even cry when she realised she felt worse about never seeing Reno again than she did about killing the children._

xoxoxoxoxox

She couldn't do it. She couldn't go back. Looking at the streets, children screaming and laughing, playing and being young and alive... She couldn't do it.

She went straight into the first bar she came across, ordering a double vodka, neat.

'Elena?'

She looked at the barmaid, eyes widening in shock. 'T,Tifa?'

The brunette woman smiled at her, looking surprised too. 'It's been a while, huh?'

Elena nodded, swallowing her drink quickly. 'You want me to go, I take it?'

Tifa laughed slightly. ' "As long as you're payin', I've no problem with you stayin.'" That's my motto with the other Turks.'

'You and Rude...'

She giggled. 'You've stayed up to date with the gossip, I see.'

'I'm surprised you've stayed together so long,' remarked Elena.

Tifa poured them both a shot. 'It's been hard,' she said, candidly. 'He's very honest with me.'

Elena raised an eyebrow. 'Oh?'

'He told me... what you all did.'

'Oh.' Her voice was very small. 'Yeah, I guess that would be a pretty big thing to keep from someone.'

The barmaid nodded. 'Yeah,' she said drily. 'It would be.'

'You forgave him though?'

'It took a while. A _long _while. But...' Tifa shrugged. 'What you all did was terrible. Disgusting. Despicable. But... to not forgive people their weaknesses... well. It's not much better, is it?'

Elena stared at Tifa. 'You... you mean that?'

Tifa nodded. 'With all my heart. People are weak, Elena. You're weak, I'm weak, Cloud, Rude and Tseng are weak. But we learn. And when we learn, we get stronger.' She shruged, smiling slightly. 'I love Rude,' she said, blushing. She watched Elena, carefully. 'Like you love Reno... and he loves you.'

Elena looked at her, shocked. 'How'd you know?'

She grinned. 'Rude tells me things. Plus, it was pretty obvious. The way you looked at him... What he said to you in the tunnel that time... It was kinda sweet.'

'In the tunnel...' Elena frowned. 'He said... 'If we can save our lives...''

Tifa smiled. 'Yeah.. that always kinda stuck with me, however much you guys annoyed us,' she said, teasingly.

'Tifa... what do you think he meant by that?'

She blinked. 'Well, that if the two of you could survive, then you could finally be together, right? I mean, Rude told me how tough it was for you, after Tseng and Rufus got injured. I always figured he meant you'd finally get your chance.'

Elena nodded slowly. 'You're... right,' she whispered, voice filled with wonder. 'He... wanted to be with me...' She laughed suddenly, then clapped her hand to her mouth, because the sound was so foreign to her. She threw some gil down on the counter. 'I'll see you later, okay?'

Tifa laughed. 'It's good to see you again, Elena.'

The streets were quieter when she went outside. It was getting dark. The children were going home, their moms were cooking them dinner, their dads were getting home from work. She stood for a moment, Tifa's words running through her head. _Forgiveness, weakness__**chance**_

Not everyone was like Tifa, she knew that. In fact, most people _weren't _like her. She possesed an unusually kind, loving heart, and in retrospect, Elena wasn't that surprised that she'd forgiven them. It didn't mean that everyone would feel the same, in fact she was pretty sure they wouldn't. Elena had thought she'd never be able to forgive herself, or her friends either, but if even just one person could look her in the eye, knowing what she'd done...

And Reno... Oh, Reno. The weakest of them all, she knew that. In the tunnel, he'd said to her _'You were a great Turk, Elena.'_ And she'd been so _angry _at him, because it sounded like he was giving up, being weak again... But for once, he was being strong! '_If we can save our lives..._'

_I can be strong too, _thought Elena. _I can... forgive Reno._

A/N- a bit fluffy at the end lol, but of course, it's never that easy lol. The next two chappies are both flashbacks, and then the one after that is the last one! Dun dun dun... Anywho, in the next chapter, the Turks head to Wutai, and Tseng gets skewered by Sephiroth. After that, Meteor presses down on Midgar... what were the Turks thinking when it seemed as though the world would end? Please review XD


	10. Holiday

Chapter Ten

Then

Elena though Reno was joking, or drunk, when he bounced into their office a few days later, joyously singing that they were going on holiday.

They had entered something of a lull since Rocket Town. Rude had gotten a couple of days leave, to recover from his somewhat embarrassing incident, and so Elena and Reno had been stuck in the office together. It had been fun, for maybe two hours, and then Reno had started to annoy the hell out of Elena. He wasn't in the mood to work, and kept coming up with fun, distracting ideas; chair races, and paper aeroplane contests. Elena was not impressed. She tried locking Reno out of the office, but Tseng made her let him back in. She tried bribing him into doing work by giving him sweets, but he just made noise with the wrappers. Eventually, she yelled at him, telling him to work or she would kick his sorry, red headed ass. Reno muttered something about PMS, and missing Rude, but finally shut up and started doing something productive.

When he bounced into the office, singing the Wutain national anthem, Elena glared at him. 'Reno, for fuck's sake...'

'We're going on holiday!' he told her, grabbing her by the wrists and pulling her to her feet. She rolled her eyes and tried to wrench out of his grip, but he wouldn't let her.

'Reno...'

'Lena, come on! We're going to Wutai! Tseng's lettin' us take a vacation!'

A voice from the door said 'It's true.'

Elena looked at Rude. 'Really?'

'Mm hm. Reeve says that AVALANCHE have stalled, and we've received no news on Sephiroth in days. They're still trying to track this Temple, but 'til they find it...'

'So we're going to Wutai?'

Reno nodded, jubilantly. 'Yup. We've got a pagoda there. It's so awesome, and there's this bar, and the weather's always great, and...'

'Breathe, Reno,' Elena advised, a slight smile on her face. She frowned. 'I'm a bit surprised. I'd have thought that at a time like this they'd need us here...'

Rude grunted. '... But they also know they have to keep us sweet. And it's a selfish move on Tseng's part. He gets four days away from Reno.'

Elena hid a smile as Reno made a face. 'Well. Okay then. It sounds fun.'

'Oh, it is. Believe me. There's this bar, Turtles Paradise, and they make the most _awesome _cocktails.'

Rude rolled his eyes, though it was hidden behind his shades. 'Girl's drinks,' he said, dismissively.

Reno stuck his tongue out. 'Whatever, man. Lena, you'll love it.'

She smiled at him. 'I'm sure I will.'

Tseng came into the office. 'Hello Elena,' he greeted her.

'Hello sir. Reno's been filling me in about this vacation.'

Tseng smiled, the joyous smile of someone who would soon be in a Reno free zone. 'Yes. I'm sorry I can't accompany you.'

Rude stifled a snort. 'Sure,' he muttered.

'In all seriousness, Elena, be sure to take in all the sights of Wutai. It's not somewhere you'll often get to go, and it really is rich in culture and history.'

'The girls are hot, too!' Reno added, eagerly.

Tseng glared at him. 'Shame they don't think the same of you, hey Reno?'

Rude laughed openly this time. Tseng turned to Elena, grinning. 'Reno tried to hit on my sister once, not realising she's a black belt in karate.' A nostalgic look passed over his face. 'I've never liked Reno more than when his jaw's wired shut.'

Reno was beginning to pout. Feeling a bit sorry for him, being the butt of the teasing, Elena asked 'When do we leave?'

'A Shinra plane is ready to take you whenever you're ready,' Tseng told her. 'I'd advise you to go as soon as possible though, or you'll get there very late.'

'Should I just finish this report before we go?'

Tseng hid a smile. 'No, that's okay. I can fill in the gaps for you.'

She smiled brightly at him. 'Thank you, sir.'

'Call me Tseng,' he admonished her, gently. Reno watched the exchange, frowning slightly.

xoxoxoxo

Three hours later, the Turks were on a very comfy jet, 30,000 feet above North Corel. Reno was asleep with his head on Elena's shoulder. The blonde Turk was reading an article in 'Midgar Society' about the Shinra family and Rude was watching the world move past beneath them.

Elena frowned. 'Rude. This article... well, it says that Rufus' mother died in a car accident. But I thought...'

Rude grunted. 'You've heard the rumors.'

She nodded, hesitantly.

Rude shrugged. 'No-one's sure, really. I think Rufus made himself believe it, as further ammunition against his father. You know he was tipping off AVALANCHE at one point?'

Elena nodded. 'I heard,' she murmured. 'But, I mean, President Shinra was a selfish man. But... having his wife killed... he'd have to be _evil_!'

'I don't know. Her family was pretty affluent. He saw their connection to him as a threat, I'm sure. As to whether he had her killed or not...' Rude shrugged again. 'We'll never know now, I imagine.'

Elena shivered, feeling a sudden burst of sympathy for the cold president. What a horrible environment to grow up, thinking that your father could be responsible for your mother dying...

The sad feeling stuck with her even as they landed in Wutai. Reno had woken up over Rocket Town, cranky and with a sore neck, but he'd quickly cheered up when he'd remembered where they were going. He'd noticed that something was wrong with Elena, but luckily was too psyched up to try and find out what. Instead, he'd started up a rousing chorus of his song du jour, the Wutain national anthem, stopping only when Rude threatened to ring the highly patriotic Tseng and let him hear how Reno was butchering his country's theme.

Elena was surprised by how cold it was when they stepped off the plane. She didn't know why, but she'd always assumed the Western country would be warm- not the cloying heat of Costa del Sol, but a smooth, pleasant one.

'It warms up,' Reno told her. 'Then during the day all the girls walk around in these teeny tiny clothes... Hey, Lena, did you bring anything like that?'

Her glare silenced him, at least until they reached the pagoda. It was a beautiful building, built recently, but in the style of classic Wutain architecture. Inside was spartanly decorated, but the walls were covered in ornate carvings. Elena stood in the entrance, gazing around. She felt Reno stop behind her.

'Nice, isn't it,' he remarked. He was close enough that she could feel his breathing against her neck, and she was surprised by the pleasure this sensation bought her.

'Yeah, it's beautiful,' she answered, voice slightly shaky.

It was late, so they decided to go to bed. Reno pouted for a while; he wanted to go straight to the bar, but the other two were adamant.

'Tomorrow,' Elena promised him. When they said goodnight, he gave her a kiss on the cheek. His lips were soft and warm: even when she woke the following morning, she could still feel exactly where they'd touched her.

xoxoxox

They went to the bar shortly after midday. Reno and Rude both started drinking instantly. Elena ordered a lemonade, but she promised Reno she'd move onto the hard stuff later.

'I don't like drinking when there's still dew on the grass,' she told him, smirking slightly. He stuck his tongue out at her.

It was funny, Elena was thinking of AVALANCHE when the tavern door opened. She'd had a couple of drinks by then, at the behest of Reno, and as she wasn't a big drinker she already felt buzzed. As nice as it was to have a few days off to just relax, she couldn't help but feel they were neglecting their duties somewhat. She hated the idea of things happening when they weren't there...

Odd then, that it took a second for her to register that it was Cloud who'd just walked through the door, accompanied by the slutty looking barmaid and that damn Ancient. When she realised who it was, she leapt to her feet.

'Yy ,you!? How did you get here!' _No, come on Elena, just get to the point._ 'Never mind that. I guess it's fate that brought us together. Get ready to die!' She pulled out her gun, training it on them. She shot a look at Reno and Rude to make sure they were ready, but they were just... _sitting there and drinking?_

'Elena, you talk too much,' said Reno, sounding amused.

Elena stared at him in disbelief. 'What?!'

'What are we doing out here?' Reno asked her, patiently, a little smile on his face.

'We're taking a vacation and resting up,' she answered, feeling a little stupid.

'Now our vacation is ruined,' declared Reno, a teasing note in his voice.

'But...'

'Even the booze tastes bad now,' added Rude, still taking a hefty swig.

Elena muttered 'Sorry,' then sat back down. Reno rubbed her foot with his under the table, to show her he was joking, but she still felt a bit embarrassed, and a bit angry too.

Reno ignored AVALANCHE, who backed off warily. 'Drink, Rude! How long have we been a team?' He shook his head. 'There have been hard times, being a Turk, but I'm glad I did it.'

Elena glared at him slightly. He was obviously drunk. Rude wasn't much better.

'To the Turks... To Reno!'

Elena looked over at AVALANCHE, glowering. 'You're lucky!' she called out. 'Next time we meet I won't be so nice. Now get out of my sight!'

As spiky head and his pals left, looking at her as though she was nuts, Reno hooted with laughter. 'Lena's drunk!' he crowed.

She kicked him, hard, under the table.

'Ow! God, I shoulda guessed you'd be a violent drunk,' he muttered.

'Reno, Rude, they're here!' she burst out. 'Why aren't we doing something?'

'Cause at the moment we're gettin' paid to do this,' Rude indicated his glass. 'Not to work.'

'Yeah, but...'

'But nothing. We're having fun, right?' He poured her another drink. 'C'mon Lena, lighten up.'

She tried to forget about AVALANCHE, and their close proximity, and was just about managing to, when the door opened, and two Shinra soldiers came running in.

'He _is _here! Turks, you're back-up!'

Reno sighed, finishing his drink. 'What a drag.'

'What?!' spluttered the soldier, staring at Reno in shock.

'Right now we're off duty and can't run off to save your asses,' said Reno, signalling the barman for another drink.

The soldier looked stunned. 'We know you're off duty, but-'

'If you knew that, then don't bother us!' snapped Reno. 'Just lookin' at you is makin' me sober!'

'But you all have orders too,' tried the soldier. Reno didn't budge. The soldiers glared at him. 'All right, that's it! We'll get him without any help from the Turks, you'll see. And...' the soldier seemed to be getting more and more angry due to Reno's silence. 'Don't think HQ won't hear about this!'

They ran from the tavern. Reno laughed.

Elena sighed. 'Reno, do you really think that was such a good idea? I mean, is that the way a professional, a _Turk_, would act?'

'Elena, don't misunderstand,' said Reno, seriously. 'A pro isn't someone who sacrifices themself for their job. That's just a fool.'

Elena gazed at him in disgust. 'Rude?' She turned to the bald man. He just shrugged. 'Well I don't buy that!' Neither man would meet her eyes. She stood up, throwing a handful of gil to the table. 'Goodbye.'

xoxoxoxo

It had seemed like such a good idea at the time, making a statement, leaving them having had the last word. But now, tied to a cliff face alongside a green faced ninja brat, an STD ridden, lard ass pimp chortling below her, Elena was beginning to wish she'd stayed in the bar. Corneo, that absolute asshole, had grabbed her nearly the second she'd left, then he'd left her alone with the heinous Yuffie for nearly an hour, making her long for Reno and his stupid antics in the office. Then they'd dragged her up this cliff, and now here she was, hanging by her wrists, which really, fucking _hurt_, and she had a feeling she was either going to be raped or die, or maybe both, within the next hour. She knew Turks didn't cry, but just then she really _wanted _to.

Yuffie was struggling like crazy, and screaming at Corneo, who was just parading around beneath them, snickering.

'Hmm, delicious! Scrumptious! I think I've found a new hobby! Which one will it be...' He stared up at the two of them, then mimed groping their breasts. Yuffie spat at him, a glob landing in his bushy ass yellow hair. Elena stifled a giggle, though the urge to laugh left her when he stopped beneath her.

'Should I go with her?'

'Hey! I'm one of the Turks! Don't think you can get away with this!' she warned him.

He ignored her, as everyone seemed to be doing today. 'Or maybe her...' he did a little dance under Yuffie, who shrieked mightily.

'Ooh. I've made my choice... My companion for the night will be... The cheerful one!'

Yuffie went green. 'GROSSNESS!' she screamed. Elena felt mildly relieved, til she realised this meant she'd probably die sooner.

'Ooh, and she's saucy too!' Corneo suddenly stopped. 'Hmm? Who's there?'

Elena had never thought she'd be so glad to see Spiky head and his friends. Yuffie slumped forward. 'Oh man, Cloud!'

Corneo made a face. 'Hmm. Long time no see.'

Elena felt faint as they bantered. _Get the fuck on with it, _she thought, glaring at Cloud.

She felt almost bored as they fought off some beast Corneo had summoned, bored enough to actually consider talking to Yuffie. Thankfully, they killed it before she did.

Corneo paled. 'Um... Please!' He suddenly sounded as though he was crying. 'Just... give me a chance! Wait... I... Why do you think a bad guy like me would swallow his pride and plead for his life?'

Elena rolled her eyes.

'1- Because he's ready to die, 2- Because he's sure to win, 3- Because he's clueless?'

'4- Because he's a spineless ass face,' muttered Yuffie, eliciting a snicker from Elena.

Cloud sighed. '3?'

'Bzzzzzz- WRONG!' Corneo flipped a lever, and suddenly the two were upside down. Elena shrieked.

'If I push this button, they'll fall upside down, and we'll have SQUASHED TOMATOES!' Corneo was dancing maniacally.

'Damn,' said Cloud, looking worried.

'Coward!' spat the barmaid chick.

'Haha, you're mine too!' Corneo promised her.

Suddenly, there were footsteps. Corneo stiffened. 'Who's there?'

Elena twisted as far as she could. Was that...

'The Turks!' Corneo sounded terrified. Elena thought she would cry with relief.

'You knew this was going to happen, ever since you leaked that secret,' said Reno, sounding bored. 'We're going to take care of you... personally.'

'Then they're all going with me!' Corneo sounded desperate. He jerked forward, then there was a shot. Rude appeared, holding a paralytic gun, just watching as Corneo teetered by the edge.

'Good timing, Rude,' said Reno, approvingly.

Rude nodded. 'Let's get to work.'

_Finally, _thought Elena.

'All right, Corneo. This'll be over quick, so listen up. Why do you think we went to all the trouble of teaming up with those guys to get you? 1- Because we were ready to die? 2- Because we were sure of victory? 3- Because we were clueless?' Reno looked at him, expectantly.

Elena nearly missed his answer. _They teamed up with them... for me?__ Reno..._

'Two, number two!' said Corneo, desperately.

'All wrong,' said Reno, stamping on his hand.

'No, wait, stooop!' shrieked the Don, as he fell to his death.

Reno adjusted his goggles. 'The correct answer was...' He looked up at Elena, catching her eye, letting her know the real reason. 'Because it's our job.'

She smiled at him. 'Thank you, I... never expected you to come help.'

Reno winked almost imperceptibly. 'Don't act so weak. You're a Turk.'

She made a face at him. 'You're right... sir.'

He glared at her.

'...Thanks,' said Tifa, the barmaid, reluctantly.

Reno was about to say something, when his PHS rang. He answered it. 'Yeah... this is Reno. Yes... yes, I'll get on it right away.' He hung up.

'Was that the company?' asked Elena.

Reno nodded. 'Yeah, they want us to find Cloud...'

The three AVALANCHE members pulled out their weapons, looking wary again. Neither Reno nor Rude moved.

'Are we on?' asked Rude.

Reno scratched his neck. 'No, today we're off duty.'

Cloud nodded at him. Reno just glared at him.

Yuffie suddenly shrieked 'Who cares about that? GET ME DOWN!'

xoxoxoxo

Rude had gone in search of some kind of lotion for Elena's wrists, which were rubbed raw from the rope, leaving her alone with Reno. She had been very quiet on the way back from the mountain. Rude had carried her some of the way, as she was exhausted from straining. Now she was sitting on the futon style couch, wrapped in a blanket, ignoring the coffee that Reno had made her. The redhead was standing in the doorway, drinking a beer, watching her.

'I'm... sorry,' she said, softly. 'I... screwed up, didn't I.'

Reno shrugged, coming to sit beside her on the couch. He lifted her hands, looking at her wrists, wincing slightly. 'Ouch. He had you pretty tightly.'

She nodded. 'Y,yeah.' She examined his face, biting her lip slightly. 'Are you mad at me?'

He looked at her in surprise. 'No. Should I be?'

'Reno, you had to team up with AVALANCHE 'cause of me! You had to climb a mountain- 'cause of me! You had to stop drinking- 'cause of me! You had to-'

'Woah, woah, woah. Lena. Calm down! Whew. Look, I didn't mind doing any of that.'

'Yeah, right,' she muttered.

'No, it's true. You're a Turk Lena, but you're a friend too. You were in trouble, we helped you. It's cool.'

Elena sighed. 'I just... I keep doing things wrong, don't I.'

'Everyone makes mistakes. These experiences will make you a better Turk.'

'They... will?'

Ren nodded. 'Of course.'

Elena smiled at him. 'Thanks, Reno.'

He stroked the back of her hand, affectionately. 'It's no problem.' They sat in comfortable silence for a while, Reno still stroking the back of her hand. It felt nice, the gentle pressure sending little sparks down her arm...

'Reno?' she turned to look at him. 'Were you... worried about me?'

'...Kinda.'

'Huh! Only kinda?'

He smiled. 'I trust you. I know you can look after yourself.' His face darkened. 'But... Corneo...' He shook his head. 'I hate that man. If he'd have laid a finger on you...'

Elena looked at him, touched by the obvious anxiety in his voice. 'He didn't,' she told him, softly.

Reno looked down at her. 'Elena...' Very gently, he touched her cheek, caressing it with the back of his hand.

_I love how he says my name,_ she thought giddily, leaning her face into his hand. She wasn't sure if she was moving _up _to him, or if he was coming _down _to her, but somehow their faces were together, their lips brushing. It was a soft, brief kiss, but Elena still felt breathless.

'Reno...'

She would have said more, only the door banged. They sprang apart, just as Rude entered, carrying a pharmacy bag. She smiled shakily as she accepted it, not looking up as Reno stood, saying he needed a beer.

_It's a good thing Rude came in_, she told herself. _It is..._ But for the rest of the evening, all she could think of were his lips on hers, and the softness as their skin touched.

A/N- lol, my sister Nina had a baby, so I had to go home for a few days which is why my updating basically stalled for a couple weeks. Anyway such a long chapter lol and not even everything I wanted to put in! I still think there'll only be two more chapters- the last one is written already! The next one'll be up in a couple days, and we'll finally get to see Tseng skewered lol. Thanks for all the reviews and favorites, and for all the hits too! Review this chap? XD


	11. Spirit

Chapter Eleven

Then

It was pretty cold. Elena stared down at the city, her cigarette making trails in the still air, wondering when the seasons had shifted. Was it when they'd found Tseng, pale as a sheet, cut straight through by AVALANCHE? Or when Shinra had imploded, literally, taking a good portion of the city down, and claiming most of Rufus along with it?

She flicked the ash, watching as it floated to the ground. She didn't like this, the fact that Shinra was essentially run from the hospital now, because everyone who was important was damaged in some way... Palmer, left paralysed from the incident in Rocket Town, was not the easiest of patients. Poor Rude, it had fallen to him to stay with the man, as the failed Space Program director blamed the Turk for what had happened to him. Tseng was in and out of physio most of the time: he had survived the attack, just, but had sustained nerve damage. He would walk again, the doctors assured them of that, but it would be a long, arduous process. Anyone could sit with him- despite his somewhat cold reputation, Tseng was a people person; he liked to talk, and to listen also. It was Reno who spent most of his time there.

_Not me, _thought Elena, taking a long drag. No, never Elena. It was too awkward, too painful, to be near the man, after what had passed between them outside the Temple.

_'Hey, Elena, how 'bout dinner after this job's over?'_

Did he like her? Was it a friendly offer, a meal between companions? Or was there more to it? She remembered what Rude had said, outside Gongaga- _'No, she likes Tseng.'_Did Tseng think that too?

_'Th,thank you very much. If I may be excused.'_

_Did I mean it? _She thought about this nearly everyday. Had she said yes out of politeness? She certainly liked Tseng. Who wouldn't? He was sophisticated, caring... definitely handsome. _But you've never _liked _him. _Whatever had been in their heads then, it didn't really matter, she supposed. There was Cloud, his sword, Tseng's pain...

_And then that night... _

xoxoxoxoxox

_'Are you okay?' _

_'Stupid question.'_

_'... Sorry.'_

_'Why are you here, Lena?'_

_'I just... wanted to make sure you don't do anything stupid.'_

_'I'm not you, Elena.'_

_'You know what? Fuck you, Reno. I came here to be nice. You think I like sitting in some stinking bar, watching you get hammered?'_

_'...Thank you, Elena.'_

_She'd stared at him in surprise, shocked at the rawness of his tone, the sincerity within it._

_'That's okay.'_

_He'd bought her a drink, and then another, and then she'd bought herself one, because he didn't want her to think he was trying to get her drunk. She'd laughed._

_'Tonight I think I can do that by myself,' she'd told him, drily._

_He'd laughed, just a little, then they'd lapsed into silence. She didn't know who'd made the first move__, though she thought it was her. Su__ddenly__ they were kissing desperately__, h__er hands on the back of his neck__ pulling him closer, his hands on her shoulder blades, thin fingers spanning nearly her whole back. She didn't remember how they'd gotten home, probably a cab, and then they were at Reno's apartment, the one he ke__pt in the city for the weekends__ that he'd barely used since Elena had become a Turk, not that she knew that. She was surprised by how neat it was, because Reno was not the most organised guy in the world, but she hadn't commented on it. How could she, when his fingers were on her, rough and calloused and gentle all at them same time, making her come quicker than she e__ver had before, even by herself?__ Then he was inside her, and their breaths and moans were all she could hear. He kissed her neck, and she was lucid enough to wonder once more at the softness of his lips.__ When he came__ he said her name, and she couldn't tell if it was a gasp, a sob, or an accusation._

xoxoxoxoxoxox

Elena stubbed out the cigarette. It was her turn to sit with Rufus, a task she found dull as well as depressing. The president was comatose, so it wasn't as though he cared who was with him. But she supposed that if he woke, he'd want a familiar face near him. But, Elena wasn't exactly familiar. They'd met, what, twice? And besides, everyone knew Reno was his favorite, for whatever reason. Elena smiled slightly. Maybe she should tell Rufus she'd slept with Reno, whisper it into his unhearing ears, try and shock him out of unconsciousness with jealousy. Except she'd never told anyone what had happened between them, and she wasn't about to start now. Rude probably knew, she mused as she nodded to the guards at Rufus' door. Settling herself down beside the bed, she sighed. The Turks didn't really talk that much anymore. At least, Elena didn't talk. She was once again the odd one out- the only woman, the only screw-up, now the only one the others didn't bother with.

She rolled her eyes at the self pity party, especially when she considered how much worse off Rufus was. She poked the president. 'I got you though, eh Rufs?' she said in a jovial tone. Ha, she'd almost expected him to wake up and kick her ass for that one.

xoxoxoxoxox

A couple of days later, Reeve informed them that AVALANCHE were nearing the tunnels beneath Midgar. The Turks were called to Tseng's room.

'You need to keep the tunnels bare,' the Wutain told them. 'Hojo and Scarlet need space, and they certainly don't need AVALANCHE bursting in on them. Try and get rid of them, okay?'

Elena nodded. 'Of course,' she said, softly.

Rude grunted in reply. Reno sighed, scratching the side of his neck. 'Sure,' he said, sounding less than enthusiastic.

As they were leaving, Tseng suddenly called out 'You three, wait!'

They turned back, surprised. 'What's up, boss?' asked Reno.

'Come back alive, okay?' Tseng's brush with mortality had made him painfully aware of how quickly life could be ended. If they were to die when the Meteor struck, it would be together at least.

As one, the three Turks saluted. It was the first time Elena had seen Reno make any gesture that was even slightly respectful, and the thought that he cared for their leader enough to do so made her smile.

Tseng nodded at them, a slight smile on his lips. 'I'll see you later,' he told them.

xoxoxoxoxox

They were quiet in the tunnels, the only sound being the tapping of their shoes, and the soft sigh of their breathing. Elena walked slightly ahead of the other two, gazing straight ahead. Reno didn't try and speak to either her or Rude, which was rare, but Elena was grateful. The big talk, if it were ever to happen, would come later, not here in the bowels of their home.

They'd been walking quite a long time when Elena heard voices ahead of them. She walked a bit faster, turning a corner. Reno hissed at her.

'Elena, wait!'

She turned to look at him, surprised.

'Let's try and get outta this without fighting, okay?'

'But our orders, Reno...' She sighed. 'Look what they did to Tseng...'

Reno laughed, humorlessly. 'You really think Spikey's sword coulda done that to your precious Tseng?'

AVALANCHE appeared in their part of the tunnel, weapons bared. Elena turned to Reno, glaring.

'Oh, you think so?'

'Elena, you talk too much,' said Reno, dismissively.

'We're Turks, Elena,' said Rude from behind her.

She looked at them in disbelief, then turned to AVALANCHE. 'Our orders were to seek you out and kill.' She looked at Reno pointedly. 'Our company may be in turmoil, but an order's an order. That's the will and spirit of the Turks! Believe it!'

Reno sighed. 'I'm not really up for it,' he confessed.

Cloud seemed unsure what to do. Elena was growing angrier.

'What are you doing, let's go!'

'No, let's not go,' said Cloud, tiredly.

Elena jumped. 'What?! You're showing pity? Don't take us for fools...'

'Wait, Elena,' said Reno, stepping forward a bit. She looked at him.

'You're not violating the order, are you?'

'Shinra's finished,' shrugged Reno. 'It's come down to this.'

She spun round to face Rude. 'Well?'

He turned away from her.

'Elena, you were a great Turk,' said Reno, with feeling.

_Why's he talking like that? We're still Turks..._

'If we both survive... If we can save our lives...' he trailed off.

'Our mission's finished,' said Rude, softly. They began to walk away, expecting Elena to come with them.

She stood for a moment, and time seemed to stop. Reno, Rude, Cloud, Tifa, the pilot guy... they all seemed to freeze. _'If we can save our lives...' _God, was Reno giving up already? Elena swallowed hard, feeling too hot all of a sudden, as though Meteor was penetrating the tunnels. She shook her head.

'Remember the spirit of the Turks,' she said softly. She wasn't sure if she was talking to AVALANCHE, Reno, or herself.

xoxoxoxoxo

They'd done all they could, and now there was nothing left to do but wait. Midgar was a ghost town- they'd evacuated as many as they possibly could to the slums, calling on even the retired Turks to help them. Elena had seen her sister for the first time in months, and when they'd embraced she'd felt real emotion for her sister, knowing what she'd gone through first hand. How sad that she was only starting to understand her just as life as they knew it would probably be altered forever.

And now they were in Kalm, waiting as patiently as they could for death or whatever it was they had before them. Not much had changed except the scenery: Rufus was still asleep; Tseng still tired quickly; Rude still said nothing; Reno and Elena...

There was less than a week to go, by Reeve's calculations, and he admitted that AVALANCHE were having some problems reaching Sephiroth in the Northern Cave, and so Elena had pretty much resigned herself to a fiery inferno. Sitting in the town square, smoking a cigarette, she gazed at the red orb that taunted them, feeling her breathing falter as she imagined the pain they would suffer.

_I don't want you to suffer..._

Reno's voice behind her made her jump. 'Hey, Lena.'

'Jesus Reno!' Elena grabbed her chest, feeling her heart race beneath the skin. 'Are you trying to kill me?!'

'Sorry.' He sat beside her on the low wall, his long legs settling somewhat awkwardly. 'Bad habit,' he said after a moment, indicating the cigarette.

'If we live through this, I'll quit,' she said, not really meaning it.

He smiled slightly. 'Liar.'

She turned to look at him. God, but she loved to look at his face. He had spiky eyelashes that were almost gold in color, and soft pale skin that went pink when he got anxious or ambarassed. Oh, and his _mouth_...

She swallowed hard. 'I miss you,' she told him, softly.

He shifted closer to her, putting his arm around her shoulder a bit clumsily. She leaned against him, feeling how warm he was. 'I miss you,' he said, his voice unusually quiet.

They sat like that for a long time, not talking. Elena sighed, moving closer to him. She felt his arm tighten around her. 'You okay?' he asked her.

'Stupid question,' she said, smiling a bit. Then she sighed again. 'I don't wanna die,' she said simply.

'That's fair enough,' he said with a smile.

She shook her head, pulling back from him a bit. 'No, I mean... I don't wanna die, knowing what I've done.'

He frowned slightly. 'What do you mean?'

'Shinra, Reno. We had a hand in causing this, even if we only played a relatively small part.'

Reno shrugged. 'Shinra was trying to make the world a better place. Okay, so the methods weren't great, but...'

She stared at him, in disbelief. 'Reno... how can you think that?'

'Faith, I guess.'

She pulled away completely. 'Shinra created an underground city for the poor, where they could never see the light. They raised taxes constantly, they put no money into healthcare or schooling, just into their own pockets...'

'Shinra made you, Lena,' said Reno, warningly. 'You, your sister, your dad...'

'And look where they are now! My father is dead, my sister is an exhausted wreck at the age of twenty three...'

Reno wouldn't meet her eye. She stared at him for a long time, then she sighed. 'Well, I guess it doesn't matter anymore, does it? I mean, we're all gonna die when this thing hits, so...' She stood and started to walk away. After a second, Reno called out to her.

'Elena, wait.'

She turned around. 'What, Reno?'

'Let me ask you something. Your mom is still alive, right?'

She sighed. '...Yes,' she said, finally.

'She lives in, like, Icicle, right?'

'Yes.'

'You coulda got there, couldn't you? I mean, Rosalind's gone back, right?'

Elena didn't reply.

'So why did you stay here then? Not because you're scared of getting punished. I mean sure, we all know what happens to Turks who try and quit- but Tseng's not gonna shoot you, nor is Rude, and I sure as _hell _wouldn't. So it's not that.'

She started to speak, but he cut her off. 'You stayed because you belong, Elena. 'Cause you're one of us. Not Shinra,' he said, as she started to protest. 'A Turk.'

Elena stared at him, then shook her head. 'No, that's not it.' She smiled slightly, without any humor or happiness. 'I stayed because...'

She was cut off by a huge jolt, that threw them to the side. The smell of burning metal that had been in the atmosphere for the last few weeks intensified suddenly, and it seemed it was getting darker.

'Reno?' Elena's voice was high with panic.

Thin fingers slid around hers. 'I'm here, Lena.'

'Wh,what's happening?'

'...I think this is it,' he said, darkly. He pulled Elena to him. 'Come on, we need to get back to the others.'

They struggled through the sporadic jolts and air that was thick with smog to the house where they were set up. When they entered, Rude let out a breath, and Tseng shook his head.

'Thank god you're here,' he said

They gathered in Rufus' room- Reno, Rude, Elena, Tseng, as it should always be. They didn't know where Scarlet and the others were, nor did they care. They were the Turks, no-one else.

Elena went to the window, opening in slightly.

'What are you doing?' asked Tseng.

She flushed. 'If this is the end... I...' she trailed off, embarrassed. 'I wanna breathe the air,' she said, pathetically.

Reno came up behind her, wrapping an arm round her waist. 'I understand,' he said, softly.

They stared out the window at the mess that was Midgar. Elena wondered what had happened to AVALANCHE and Sephiroth, if there was any chance for the planet. She leaned into Reno, because she didn't want to be alone, and because she loved him. She was aware of Tseng speaking, telling them that they were not only the best Turks he could've had, but the best friends too. Elena felt tears fill her eyes, and she knew it was affecting Reno too, because he pressed his lips to the top of her head and shivered.

Elena turned to them, smiling slightly. 'Come on guys, stop being so weak. You're Turks!'

Three voices, in perfect unison, spoke. 'Elena, you talk too much.'

Impulsively, she hugged Tseng, and then Rude, both of whom smiled slightly. She heard Rude sniff slightly.

'Rookies,' he muttered, and she could tell he was a bit choked up.

'Girls,' said Tseng teasingly, and he smiled at her.

She moved back to the window, and Reno. Meteor was getting closer and closer, the air hotter and heavier. It was too loud to speak now, and Elena thought maybe that was okay, because the lips she pressed to Reno's said everything.

When the ground began to shake she grabbed onto him, though she made sure to look at Tseng and Rude, just in case it was the last time. Both looked calm, but she saw that Rude had his hand on Tseng's shoulder, and that Tseng's hand was balled ino a fist. She smiled at them both, wishing she could have known them better.

Reno's arms tightened round her waist, and he bent her head, whispering into her ear. She caressed his hands with the tips of her fingers, glad that they could still feel. And then she gazed outside, seeing that the world was no longer bathed in red, but in a curious, milky green. She looked to Midgar, seeing undulating liquid dancing upwards, the steel necropolis below losing focus. Reno held her tighter as the liquid reached out for Meteor. She could feel his breathing increase, and she wasn't sure if this was the end or the beginning. There was an almighty crash as light met dark, and a ray of purest, most powerful light was cast across the planet. Elena turned and pressed her face to Reno.

_I stayed because of you._

She closed her eyes and waited. And waited.

A/N- I never quite got the bit in the tunnel, because Elena says something like 'I think you can go against your orders now', suggesting they were told not to fight, but then she says 'An order's an order', and that they were sent to 'Seek out and kill.' And why would they be traipsing around in the tunnels if they weren't looking for AVALANCHE? Weird lol, anyway, that was the penultimate chapter. I figured they would go to Kalm or Junon, and picked Kalm 'cause that's where Marlene and Elmyra were in the outro. Final chapter up soon! Review pleeease? XD


	12. Elena

Chapter Twelve

Now

I find myself standing in front of the Neo Shinra Building at nine o'clock in the morning. It's a cold day, of course, but for once this doesn't get me down. What is getting me down, is that for the last three days my nerve has failed me completely the second I get here, paralysing fear stopping me from getting within three feet of the entrance. Today has to be different, or else I can see myself getting on the next plane back to Junon and never coming back, living by myself, bitter and lonely forever.

I draw up every ounce of strength I have within me, most of it coming from an image of Reno that is never far from my consciousness. I am amazed at the changes within myself since I spoke to Tifa. Though I haven't yet been able to face returning to Shinra, I am aware that I am more confident, happier... I even feel healthier, crazy though it seems. I can also picture Tseng, Rude, Reno, even Rufus, without feeling as though I am going to be sick. The sound of a child laughing no longer conjures up images of death and misery, but of hope- what I did, what _we _did, was terrible, and we can never truly make up for it. But we can try and try and _try, _and maybe someday it'll be, well, not enough. But _close _enough.

And if I walk through these doors today, I can see Reno again.

I feel sick as I press my hands to the glass, pushing forward. But I take a deep breath.

_Don't be so weak Elena. You're a Turk._

I go to the desk. The woman behind it is unfamiliar, clearly not someone who was employed by the original Shinra. She looks about eighteen years old, skinny and tall, thick black hair framing a heart shaped face. I feel a stab of dislike for this young woman, wondering if Reno's ever made a move on her. She looks like his type- sharp features, long limbs. She's all angles, not a hint of softness to her. Reno always claimed not to like softness in women, which always made me wonder why he'd slept with me, why he always seemed to have an attraction to me.

I glare at her. 'I need to see Reno,' I tell her, brash and authoritative.

She raises a slim eyebrow, then shrugs. 'You got clearance?' Her accent is thick- Costan I think.

'No,' I admit. 'He'll wanna see me.'

'If you haven't got clearance, there's nothing I can do,' she shrugs, turning back to her computer screen.

'Tell him Elena's here,' I demand.

She looks up at me, clearly bored. 'I can make you an appointment with...' She flicks through a book. 'Gabriel. He's the public liaison officer for the Turks.'

Public liaison officer? Jesus. I start to wonder if I really do want to come back this world. One of the things that attracted me to being a Turk was the _lack _of contact with the public. Rufus is serious about keeping up a good image, I realise.

She's growing impatient, I can tell. I shake my head. 'No. I need to see Reno.'

She looks at me pityingly. 'Honey, if he hasn't called you back, he's not gonna. Take the hint and go home, mmkay?'

My eyes narrow, not just at her suggestion, but at the fact that Reno is clearly still a notorious womaniser. 'Listen, you jumped up little bitch...'

I am cut off by a familiar voice, calling my name from behind me. I spin round, finding myself face to face with Reeve.

'Elena. I never expected to see you again.' His voice is not warm, but he doesn't sound angry to see me.

'Reeve.' I nod at him. 'I... I need to see Reno.'

He stares at me for a minute, then nods. 'Of course.' He goes to the desk. 'Raffia, can you get a visitors pass for Elena, please?' He doesn't want me back, that much is clear, but I don't give a shit what he thinks. I need to see Reno...

Raffia rolls her eyes but nods. 'Of course, Mr Tuesti,' she said, her voice dripping honey. I hate her.

He comes back to me a second later, hands me a lanyard with VISITOR stamped on it, then starts to walk to the elevators. I realise I am meant to follow.

These elevators are not glass, and as the doors smack shut, I feel a sudden wave of claustrophobia. I remember what Reno had said about Reeve wanting to put me on trial- everyone knows how Shinra trials end. The defendant is found guilty, then is never heard of again, the world forgetting about them as their corpse rots in the laboratories. I am nervous, stuck in this tiny space with him, but I remind myself that I am a good bit younger than him, maybe not stronger, but quicker and certainly more devious. I was a Turk, after all.

_I am a Turk._

We are quiet for ten or so floors, then he turns to me. 'Why are you back, Elena?'

I shrug. 'It felt like the right time to be here again.'

'I could have had you killed, you know,' says Reeve smoothly. Involuntarily, I shiver.

'Why didn't you?'

'Because Reno would have killed _me_.'

I smile. It's true, he would have.

'Tseng and Rude also threatened to quit if I did.' There is a pause. 'I envy you you know, Elena.'

I look at him, surprised. 'You... envy me?'

He doesn't reply for a moment. When he does, his voice is flat, as though he's trying to keep the emotion out. 'I never fit in at Shinra. I didn't care about money, just about the people. I know,' he smiles slightly. 'Sounds like bullshit, doesn't it? But it's true.' He sighs. 'When I made Cait... when I entered AVALANCHE... I found something I'd never known before. People who shared my beliefs, my desires, nearly exactly. It was perfect, but,' he sighs again. I shift uncomfortably. 'I never belonged there, not really. ' He looks at me, just for a second. 'I used to see the camaraderie you had, so similar to AVALANCHE, something I never had, something I'll probably _never _have.' He shrugs. 'Even after you left, Elena, they still would risk everything for you.'

I look at the ground. 'I know,' I say, softly.

We reach the floor on which the Turks are situated, and step out of the elevator. There is an awkward silence. Reeve shrugs. 'I assume they're in their office,' he says.

We have nothing else to say to each other, but I feel as though I should say _something._

_'_Thank you.'

He smiles, very slightly. 'It's nothing.'

He goes back into the elevator with a nod. Then the doors shut, and I'm alone in this corridor. I stand for a second, just breathing, and I can't believe how familiar this seems. Just the way the place _smells_- like coffee, and gunpowder and cologne. I can also smell the perfume Rosalind always wears, the one that the biggest star of _Loveless _made, that I usually hate, but right now I feel as though I love it.

I walk towards the office. I can hear Tseng's voice, and I stop and listen to it. He's lost most of the Wutain: Midgarian is such a harsh accent that it'll cover nearly any other tone, but his voice still lilts somewhat, and there are certain words that he says that are unmistakably foreign. Rude is like that, to a certain extent. He grew up in Mideel, and mostly kept his accent, but he's spent so much time with Reno that he's picked up a fair amount of Midgar slang. As for Reno... well. He's Midgar, through and through: slang ridden, poor grammar, weird intonation. His voice is like a drawl, but it's surprisingly comforting. I could listen to him speak all day...

I can hear Tseng and Rude, and my sister as well, but I cannot hear Reno. Though Reeve said nothing when we were in the lift, a sudden panic hits me that Reno is not here, that I won't get to see him, that, that...

The door opens, and Rosalind squeals. 'Elena!'

Weird, she actually sounds happy to see me. I try and smile at her. 'Hey Rosalind.'

Tseng and Rude appear in the doorway and a genuine smile spreads across my face. They haven't changed at all, and I am so glad for this fact.

'Hey,' I say, softly.

I embrace all three in turn. When Tseng releases me, he instantly asks 'Elena, what are you doing here?'

'I...' I don't know how to explain it to them, so I don't even try. 'Where's Reno?' is all I can choke out.

A knowing look passes over Tseng's face. 'He's on the fire escape at the end of the corridor, sulking,' he tells me, smiling.

I nod. 'Okay.' I bite my lip, square my shoulders. 'Okay,' I repeat, firmer this time.

Rude is watching me. I feel self conscious. 'Are you back?' he asks.

I take a deep breath. 'I'm back.'

xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

He doesn't look up when the door opens, but he growls 'Rosalind, I swear to god, I actually hate you. Can't you give me five minutes peace?'

I smile. 'And why would I do that?'

His head jerks up, and he stares at me in disbelief. 'E,El_ena_?'

I look at him, drinking in his face. He looks thin, the scars on his face starkly evident. He never would tell me where he got them. I wonder if I'll ever be able to wheedle it out of him.

He scratches the side of his neck, anxiously. 'Elena...'

I love how he says my name. I nod at him.

'You came back?' His voice is filled with wonder.

'I... In the tunnel, the last time we saw AVALANCHE, you said to me "Elena, if we can save our lives..."' I swallowed hard. 'I hated you for that.'

His eyes widen in shock. 'Why?' He sounds stunned.

'I thought you were giving up,' I tell him. 'You didn't wanna fight, you didn't care about revenge... You said _if_. '_If _we can save our lives.' And...' I shivered slightly. 'You didn't know why I stayed.'

Confusion shows in his eyes. 'Why you... Oh. You mean in Kalm?'

I nod. 'Why do you think I stayed, Reno?'

'I, I don't know. Loyalty?'

'To who?' I press, gently.

He opens his mouth to speak, then sighs, slumping slightly. 'I don't know,' he admits.

I smile at him. '_You_, Reno. It was always you.'

'Elena...'

'If we can save our lives, maybe we'll finally get our chance.' I finish his sentence for him, and by the way he smiles, I know I've said it right. And it's funny, we've been apart for two years, there's _so _much we should be saying to each other, and yet we're just standing here, grinning like idiots. And then I realise- we have all the time we need, later. Because I'm sure as hell not going anywhere.

I virtually fling myself at Reno, kissing him as those my life will end if our lips aren't together. My arms are around his neck, and he's clinging to my waist and oh _god_, I'm such an idiot, because I could have had two years of _this._

I pull away, to tell him I love him, or to beg him never to leave me, or _somethin__g_, I don't even know. I open my mouth. 'Reno...'

'Elena.' He's grinning, and he looks so adorable that I have to stroke his cheek, wondering at the fact that he's _mine. _

'I-'

He cuts me off. 'Elena, you talk too much!'

And then he pulls me to him, kissing me with such _love_, and it's a good thing he's holding me so tight, because I think my legs have stopped working. There are tears running down my cheeks, but I don't care, because I'm _here._ I'm really, really here.

The End

A/N- Yay for Reno/Elena love lol. Well there it is, all finished ) It was a little fluffy in the finish, but I think they deserved it lol. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, read or favorited 3 Big hugs to you all! One last review maybe? XD


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